Monty Python skit

Our rendition of Monty Python's witch skit for our talent show

Here's the words in case you can't hear them:
Group: We found a witch! Burn her up!
Peasant #1: We have found a witch, may we burn her?
Group: Burn her! Burn her up!
Bedevere: How do you know she is a witch?
Peasant #1: She looks like one!
Group: Yeah!
Bedevere: Bring her forward
Woman: I'm not a witch I am not a witch!
Bedevere: But you are dressed as one
Woman: They dressed me like this. (Group shouts disagreements) And this isn't my nose, it's a false one!
Bedevere: Well?
Peasant #1: Well we did do the nose.
Bedevere: The nose?
P#1: And the hat but she's a witch!
Group: Yeah! Burn her up!
Bedeveir: Did you dress her up like this?
P#1: NO! (group echoes) Yes. (Group echoes) A bit. (Group echoes) She has got a wart.
Peasant #2 reaches a points at the wart
Bedevere: What makes you think she is a witch?
Peasant #3: She turned me into a newt!
Bedevere: A newt?
P#3: I got better
Peasant #2: Burn her anyways!!!
Group: Burn her! Burn her up!
Bedevere: Quiet Quiet Quiet. There are ways of telling if she is a witch.
P#1: Are there?
Bedevere: Tell me, what do you do with witches?
P#2: BURN THEM!!! (Group echoes)
Bedevere: And what do you burn apart from witches?
P#1: MORE WITCHES!!
P#3: Shhh!
P#2: Wood!
Bedevere: Good! So, how do we tell if she is made of wood?
P#1: Build a bridge out of her!
Bedevere: Ah, but can you not also make bridges out of stone?
P#1: Oh yeah
Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
P#1: No
P#2: It floats!!
P#1: THROW HER INTO THE POND!!!
Group: Yeah throw her in the pond!
Bedevere: What also floats in water?
P#1: Bread!
P#2: Apples!
P#3: Uh very small rocks!
P#1: Cider!
P#2: Gravy!
P#1: Cherries!
P#3: Churches!
P#1: Lead! Lead!!
King Arthur: A duck!
Bedevere: Exactly. So... logically ...
P#1: If she ... weighs the same as a duck ... she's made of wood.
Bedevere: And therefore?
Group: A witch! shes a witch!
Peasant #4: Here is a duck, Sir Bedevere.
Bedevere: We shall use my largest scales.
Bedevere: Push the Button!
Peasant #5: 'Tis the same!
Group: A witch! Burn her! Burn her up!
THE END

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• Monty
• Python
• Holy
• Grail
• She's
• witch
• camille
• katherine
• sarah
• mckynna
• erica
• jenna
• lexi
• amanda

[severelyKILLED15]

this was perfect. LMAO