Chapter 4: Games.
I can't say that what happened next was completely unexpected. "Jocelyn! Aw come on Jojo I know you're up there. Come down breakfast is almost ready!" Of course he would be the one to notice me missing and come and find me. This was bad I hadn't even stopped crying yet. I wasn't sobbing anymore but that didn't mean tears weren't still betraying me. I heard Nick sigh before anything else. Next thing I heard was the creak of the old ladder being stressed as he climbed up. I could tell just by the feel of things that I was a mess. His shocked intake of breath followed by sorry sound when he let it out was also further indication of how I might look. "Hey Jojo come on don't cry. You don't have to leave you know. You can stay with your family. It isn't a big deal." Of course he would try to make me feel better. We both know that I want to go he's just trying to make the decision easier. Too bad this isn't that reason that I was crying.
He didn't know that the real reason was because of that girl. That evil, malicious girl. There was the fact that I couldn't tell him about her and there was the fact that they weren't together anymore. I don't have to worry. I mean I care about Nick don't get me wrong but out relationship is so unique. No one can keep heads or tails of it, not even us. Especially not me. I feel like sometimes I'm his friend and sometimes I'm more. Frankly I don't get it. I shouldn't worry about her because once I came back she was gone. That has to mean something right? It has to mean that he cares about me. Even if it's just a little. Right?
Nick has a certain charm. It's something thats doesn't break. I would know. I just don't see why he keeps in contact with all these others girls. He's a sweet heart but . . . he's a player. It breaks my heart every time. Sometimes it's me. Sometimes its her. Sometimes it's me. Sometimes its her. I hate that fact that I never know who 'her' really is. He has so many different women in his life. So many ex's.
Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier for me if I did stay home. I mean yeah I really care about him but is it worth it to have my heart broken and mended so many times by the same person? Its always going to be me over her. She's always going to have something better. I'n that safety net. If they break up I'm there for the comfort. Whether he plays the role of heart breaker or not. He always comes back saying the same thing. "I made a mistake. Forgive me? I only ever cared about you Jojo." Every time I hear it it makes my heart throb, my throat sting, and my eyes burn.
Even though he's my best friend and I know him well I still never know what the truth is. I he playing me? Is he playing her? Is he playing both of us this time? I hate his sick Jokes but love him. He says he loves me but he'll choose her. I don't know if I'll ever be good enough to satisfy him. I truly don't.
"No, I want to go." My voice didn't even sound like my own.
"Okay then. Lets get home." He smiled.
Some times I'd give everything to see his smile. We made it home in about 10 minutes. My parents and my brother were in the kitchen with Joe and by the sounds of it Kevin too. It made me wonder if Frankie was in there too. All of that was out the door as soon as Nick's hand tightened around mine. "You ok?'' He asked. "I'm fine now." I tried to reassure him with a smile and because he was here I was able to make it look real.
We got to my room and he went to sit on my bed and I went to my closet. I took out clothes that I wanted to wear and I took them with me to the bathroom. I closed the door and changed before reopening it again. I washed my face off and when I pulled my face up I was startled to see Nick's reflection next to mine. He chuckled a silent laugh and wrapped his arms around my waist. I smiled. I liked times like this. He was taller than me so I could feel his warm chest on my back. I hadn't notices until not that I was cold. He could tell by the goose bumps on my arms. Although I'm not sure if they were due to the fact that I was cold or because I could feel his breath on my neck. I could feel his silent chuckles behind me. "What?" I asked curiously. "Nothing." He smiled but it was nothing more that a whisper against my lips.
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Forgetting Love Justin//Alex one-shot!by itsxdeexdork2,422 views
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