2009-04-23 - Please Stand Up!
Tim:
May I have your attention please, May I have your attention please, Will the (real) pregnant ladies please stand up, I repeat, will the (real) pregnant ladies please stand up were gonna have a problem here.....
Matt:
1) Y'all act like you've never seen a pregnant women before, Poor eating habits, Do to poverty and low economic galore, Many more problems like anxiety, stress, and trauma, 5) Resulting in low birth weight from the baby's mama, It's the return of the "Ah wait, no way you're kidding. 7) That isn't malnutrition? Couldn't be! 8) And Dr. Dre said, 9) To take folic acid daily, keeping a straight head for a healthy baby 10) Chigga chigga chigga, slim girly, I'm sick of her, look at her 11) Walkin' around smokin' crack and shootin' up 12) Causing irritability, hypertension, yeah, but they could die though 13) Yeah you could be taking tetracyclines for acne 14) Or taking some aspirin for pains, headaches both 15) Not knowing that these over counter drugs can cause death; 16) Stunting bones and teeth growth 17) You're taking insulin, you're taking insulin 18) Not knowing that it can cause prematurity and heart defects 19) And that's the message that we deliver to pregnant girls, 20) That alcohol consumption's most common with birth defects
21) Of course they gonna know what FAS is, 22) By the time they birth their child they're gonna see the ill effects, won't they? 23) Well there might not be too bad of bums, 24) Well except for the growth failure and mental retardation problums 25) But the girls can't smoke while the baby's in there chillin'
26) Cause the effects can be harmful like infectious diseases killin' 27) But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote 28) Avoid high-risk pregnancy, wrap it up after thirty five
Michael Douglas:
1) Yo there is this thing called heredity 2) These factors effect even you and me 3) There are 46 chromosomes to be had 4) 23 from Mom and 23 from Dad
5) There are many things to know bout heredity 6) Human Genome Project increased our smarts hugely 7) The most common problem is Down Syndrome
8) The cause of this is trisomy 21 9) the olda that you are that you have the baby 10) Increases the chance for Down Syndrome immensely
11) So have your baby young, have your baby young 12) If you dont, it might have Down Syndrome 13) See there is this Sickle Cell Disease
14) 1 in 400 African Americans have Sickle Cell Disease 15) Your organs are hurt and you can't breathe with ease 16) You're unfortunate to get this blood disease 17) PKU is treatable 18) If left untreated, it's horrible 19) Mental Retardation will set in 20) But if the baby eats the right foods in wont begin (mike....should it be mama eats right foods?) 21) Environmental factors effect you and me 22) Radiation effects the body very badly
23) Avoid pollutants like Lead and Mercury 24) Dont go near Vitamin A or PCB
Mike Dutra:
1) Before and during pregnancy mother's beware 2) An STD is passed to the unborn to provide a scare 3) But don't think your child is in the clear just yet
4) Breast Milk can also pass the disease you can bet 5) Everyone knows CMV and Rubella are far from stella 6) But the birth defects are important so let me tell ya 7) Loss of sight, hearing and mental retardation 8) Are just some of the complications 9) The diseases are linked to the first trimesta 10) But for Rubella a vaccine can help ya 11) Lack of Thyroxine in the blood stream equals hypothyroidism 12) While diabetes is no insulin for carb metabolism
13) Erythroblastosis fetalis is the name given for Rh incompatibility 14) Different blood types causes mom to produce antibodies drastically
15) A rhogam injection after child number one 16) protects mom's future daughter or son 17) Mama needs to keep emotions in check 18) So illness and physical problems for child are not met 19) But don't have a kid before age fifteen 20) 'Cause low birth weight and young for date are more common it seems 21) Mom beware of Toxoplasmosis and offending protazoan for babies sake 22) Prevent severe brain sensory and motor disabilities to protect your child's fate
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This so Funny!
BimboBeaver 2 years ago