The Church Chronicles - Mississippi Squirrel Revival

The Mississippi Squirrel Revival
written by Ray Stevens
(nb March 13, 2010
timtusphil1 informs me that
"A couple named Carlene and C.W. Kalb Jr. wrote this."
And he's entirely correct!
Thanks, Tim.)

Well, when I was kid I'd take a trip every summer,
down to Mississip.
to visit my granny in her ante bellum* world.
We'd run barefooted all day long,
climbing trees, free as a song.
One day I happened catch myself a squirrel.
I stuffed him down in an old shoebox,
punched a couple holes in the top
and when Sunday came I snuck him into church.
I was sittin' way back in the very last pew
showin' him to my good buddy Hugh,
when that squirrel got loose
and went totally berserk!

What happened next is hard to tell.
Some thought it was Heaven,
others thought it was Hell,
but the fact that somethin' was among us
was plain to see!
As the choir sang "I Surrender All"
the squirrel ran up Harv Newlan's coveralls;
Harv leaped to his feet and said,
"Somethin's got a hold on me!"

Verse 2
Well Harv hit the aisles a-dancin' and a-screamin'
some thought he had religion,
others thought he had a demon
and Harv thought he had a weed eater loose
in his Fruit of the Looms.
He fell to his knees to plead and beg,
and that squirrel ran out of his britches leg,
unobserved to the other side of the room.

All the way down to the Amen pew
where sat Sister Bertha "Better than you"
Who'd been watching all the commotion
with sadistic glee.
Shoot, you should have seen the look in her eyes
when that squirrel jumped her garters
and crossed her thighs!
She jumped to her feet and said,
"Lord have mercy on me!"
As the squirrel made laps inside her dress,
she began to cry and then to confess
to sins that would make a sailor blush with shame.
She told of gossip and church dissention,
but the thing that got the most attention
is when she talked about her love life.
And then she started naming names!

Verse 3
Well, seven deacons and the pastor got saved
and 25,000 dollars got raised
and 50 volunteered for missions in the Congo
on the spot.
And even without an invitation
there were at least 500 rededications
and we all got rebaptized
whether we needed it or not.

Now you've heard the Bible story, I guess
of how He parted the waters for Moses to pass.
Oh, the miracles God has wrought in this ol' world!
But the one I'll remember to my dyin' day
is how he put that church back on the narrow way
with one half-crazed Mississippi Squirrel.

CHORUS
The day the squirrel went berserk
in the First Self-Righteous Church,
in that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival.
They were jumpin pews and shouting Hallelujah!




*"Ante bellum" = "before the war" = idyllic, peaceful

Category:

Music

Tags:

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• pentecostal
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• sermon

[32vickster]

That's fantastic! Thank you, Ray Stevens, for brightening my whole day! lol

[Rubystars1000]

Nice video

[timtusphil1]

A couple named Carlene and C.W. Kalb Jr. wrote. Ray Stevens made it famous

[fuckoffycus]

Great video Shas, thanks for putting a smile on my face :))) All the stars and more *****

[StopBSing]

great song....would love to see a lose squirrel in a church...got me imagining it,lol...do people actually get offended by stuff like this??if so how do they live day to day,must be very bad with the real world out there.haha

[hoosierhiver]

5 stars!

[sk8ergangsta2003]

wow thats odd. I just see this video when its uploaded talking about Mississippi and then i was reading about a yellow blotched map turtle because im getting pet turtles soon. turns out theyre only found in the -Pascagoula- river in Mississippi. i had to come back to check the town name i thought it was familiar.

[mctrmt]

Wonderful, Shas!

Great song choice and a fun performance.

[casetone2514]

Thank you for this one, Shas - great fun.

[krabbers]

cheers shas this has given me an idea

superb job