Premier League Poem 2011/12

The Premier League Poem is Spencer's poetic tribute to the best premier league season ever. No copyright infringement intended. Lyrics are below.
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2011/2012
Season number twenty
Kicked off on August the 13th
With a bang and goals a plenty

City asserted their dominance
And showed all what they could do
Thanks to the help of Silva
They turned Manchester blue

United got first blood
Eight goals made Arsenal groan
Wenger had sold his superstars
And sent Almunia out on loan

But the tide was already turning
It was heading the Etihad's way
In October City beat United 6-1
Even though they were playing away

Balotelli moved from bibs to tee shirts
And asked why always me
Well, because you act like a dickhead mate
That's why you left Italy

Racism reared its ugly head
In fact, it happened twice
Suarez missed eight games for what he said
Liverpool paid the price

John Terry picked on Ferdinand
And really showed his class
You're not welcome here John Terry
Stick your blue flag up your arse

The return of the old guard
Welcomed back Henry and Scholes
Arsenal's talisman reignited the flame
And United's hero got some goals

And here's to the ones we lost this year
The final whistle has blown for you
Gary Speed has gone, and far too young
We nearly lost Muamba too

Crisis struck when Mancini said,
"Carlos, get off the bench"
But Tevez said, 'No thanks, I'm fine"
And Frimpong tweeted, 'DENCH'

So Tevez worked on his golf swing
Which drove Mancini crazy
Four months later he came back saying
"I'm only here because you over-pay me"

Van Persie carried a team on his shoulders
With a champions league place at stake
A 3rd place finish was good enough
But now he might leave for his own sake

Swansea and Norwich passed the test
But the magpies became the teachers
Finishing 5th did not seem possible
Newcastle were over-reachers

Their secrets came from Senegal
A great start from Demba Ba
Was added to by Pappis Cisse
Scoring goals like Yeboah

Signing of the season goes to
The only player who achieved perfection
Stewart Downing couldn't score in a brothel
He probably couldn't get an erection

Wigan learned the premier league
Is no bed of roses
They survived thanks to the 11th commandment
Thou shalt not sell moses

Things went from bad to worse at Blackburn
The fans gave Steve Kean a kicking
Yakubu was good but in the end
Their best player was a chicken

Torres struggled in front of goal
Andy Carroll equally lacked
Their poor of form cost their managers
As AVB and Dalglish got sacked

And Joey Barton, what can we say
Undeniably a massive prick
If it wasn't the Tevez elbow that did it
It was his Aguero kick

In the end the blue moon rose
And the red devils were left in hell
Farewell to Blackburn, Wolves
And Bolton who in battle, fell.

Tevez mourned the death of Fergie
Who was still very much alive
And Ashley Young made the Olympic team
Not for football, but for his dive

And so ends the best season that ever was
Who knows if we'll see the like again
Let's hope that magic will live on
And transform Roy Hodgson's men

Maybe 2012 is the year for England
We'll have to wait and see
It might be a long shot but
Stranger things have happened in Germany.

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PREMIER LEAGUE HIGHLIGHTS SEASON FOOTBALL REVIEW
PREMIER LEAGUE HIGHLIGHTS SEASON FOOTBALL REVIEW

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