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Why Isn't there More F**king on this Island? (A song for LOST)

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Uploaded on May 23, 2010

Garfunkel and Oates (Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci) sing a song for the finale of LOST asking the question everyone really wants to know. Featuring Whit Hertford as Benjamin Linus. LYRICS:
Lost leaves us with many unanswered questions
There are countless mysteries unsolved
But of the puzzles that confound
And the loose ends left unwound
One thing I wonder most of all

Why ISN'T there more fucking on this island?
You're on the best vacation of your life
I'd take Sayid and get everything I need
I don't care that he used to have a wife

Why isn't there more fucking on this island?
When everyone on it is so hot
Jack should stop debating, and start ejaculating
Take advantage of what little time he's got

And just Fuck Fuck Fuck
'Til the smoke monster takes you away
'Til you try to carry dynamite from Black Rock
'Til the tall lady from West Wing stabs you
'Til that guy forgets to push a button

Why isn't there more fucking on this island?
When you know you're never gonna leave
You're never getting off so you might as well get off
The babies all die so who CARES if you conceive

Why isn't there more fucking on this island?
Everyone's so careful with their heart
No need to commit, let them put you in a split
And hide their external body part

Fuck Fuck Fuck
'Til you get between Michael and Walt
'Til your dad pretends not to love you
'Til you drown trying to do something selfless
'Til you're annoying and get buried alive

Why is there no fucking on this island?
Don't they know that they could have all this?
I should plow that ass Before I smother them with gas
I'm evil but I still have needs

The girls here are so very very pretty
And I also kinda like the dudes
Find some find fish to eat, then fill myself with meat
I'll say that Jacob told me to

Why isn't there more fucking on this island?
When you know you're probably gonna die
With carnage all around, all I'd wanna do is pound
You can crash your plane between my right thigh and my left thigh
Fuck Fuck Fuck
'Til you fall down a well and set off a nuke
'Til you get crushed in a plane full of heroin
'Til time travel induces a fatal nosebleed
'Til you get strangled and your corpse is transported to the island, acting as a proxy for Jack's dad, then you're in another plane crash and you get impersonated by the smoke monster and leave a suicide note saying "If only you believed me"

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