Twilight Attacks! (Parody Review with Breaking Dawn Spoilers)

Before you start gushing over that new Breaking Dawn trailer or Edward's perfect face during the midnight premiere...think about what kind of person Stephenie Meyer is telling you to be...

Twilight Attacks! A disturbing look into the infamous vampire series staring Bella Swan, Edward Cullen, and Jacob Black.
"I am all about girl power" - Stephenie Meyer -(http://www.stepheniemeyer.com/nm_thestory.html)


Music By: Merry Go Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons "Attribution 3.0" http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Quotes used from The Twilight Saga:
And more than a little obsessed by Edward himself. (Twilight 67)
"...I wrestled all night while watching you sleep..." (Twilight 303)
"I won't leave you." His voice had the seal of a promise in it.(Twilight 309)
"...It will be as if I'd never existed." (New Moon 71)
Love, life, meaning...over. (New Moon 73)
October (New Moon 85)
November (New Moon 87)
December (New Moon 89)
January (New Moon 91)
And I flung myself off the cliff. (New Moon 359)
Edward stood...I'd never seen anything more beautiful...And the last seven months meant nothing. (New Moon 451)
Edward's shielding arms had become restraints. (Eclipse 84)
He kissed me angrily, roughly, his other hand gripping tight around the back of my neck, making escape impossible...His lips forced mine open... (Eclipse 330-331)
I wasn't so angry anymore, now that Edward was with me. (Eclipse 339)
Bella vomited a fountain of blood. (Breaking Dawn 347)
"[Jacob] will be the best, kindest big brother any kid ever had...And then when she's grown up they'll be as happy as [Edward] and [Bella]." (Eclipse 176)
-The above was orginally Quil, Emily, Sam in that order and described a situation in Eclipse that was identical to Jacob's imprinting on Bella's child Renesmee in Breaking Dawn.
And then we continued blissfully into this small but perfect piece of our forever. (Breaking Dawn 754)

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• twilight
• saga
• new
• moon
• eclipse
• breaking
• dawn
• sucks
• parody
• spoof
• trailer
• clips
• anti
• feminist
• bella
• swan
• edward
• cullen
• jacob
• black
• kristen
• stewart
• rob
• pattinson
• stephenie
• meyer
• review
• vampire
• sparkle
• animated
• funny
• cartoon

[MaddiXP381]

So basically the entire saga revolves around how women can't live without a man... "I'm all about girl power." I died xD

[noaveragenerd]

The fountain of blood was genius. Great video. :D

[Megsterx01]

that was so clever ! :D xx love taylor team jacob! :D <3

[RediiRosii]

KWL!!!

[PureLightHealer]

LMAOOOOOOOOO This was PRICELESS.

[TheGosbubblan]

Haha wow, you're really good! Jakes and Nessies kids were SO cute! I likes the End with the book too ;)

[KatherineHSchneider]

Love it!

[allenabqi]

nice video!