Meggahman returs, the untimely death of a beloved comedian

Rob, a beloved comedian from Abbotsford, BC, has been stricken with the life threatening disease known as mega man syndrome.

Symptoms started for Rob as early as age four, where his parents would frequently observe him listening to Eiffel 65 and repeatedly slam the oven door on his penis.

On a side note, mega man syndrome can strike without warning if any of the following conditions are met:
-your grandparents knit you a scarf at some point
-you are color blind in one eye
-you have elongated toenails
-you drink four liters of milk per day

Unfortunately for Rob, all of the conditions were met before he had reached his third birthday.

All of Rob's friends used to tease him in school because he smelled of burnt French-fries that had been Sautéed in a cast-iron pot full of boiling expired egg-nog and the remnants of an old pizza peddler, whom had died 8 months earlier at an abandoned glue factory while trying on some homemade undergarments, created in an old junk yard with leftover sewage truck tires. Basically, this kid stank.

Rob was home schooled until grade 12, where he felt reinvigorated after graduation and left his hometown to pursue a career in stand up comedy. Comedy was Rob's fall back plan as opposed to being a mega-wizard.

Another quick side note to distinguish the differences between wizards and mega wizards.

-mega wizards are asexual and have no reproductive organs
-mega wizards are trained not to react to fire alarms
-standard wizards have a wide variety of theme songs that they can use, mega wizards, however, are restricted to the song "mega wizard", composed by Michael Bolton in 1996.
Mega Wizard is only to be played in cases of extreme emergency or distress and can only be accompanied by the following instruments:
-recorder
-xylophone
-ukulele
-any panasonic microwave oven produced from 1987-2001 *(users must be able to provide receipt upon request for this item only)*

For future reference, the lyrics to "Mega Wizard" are provided below.


"Mega Wizard, have mercy on me. Mega Wizard, Oh, have mercy on me. (x12)

Wizard so mega, so sex. No mercy for sex. Wizard so mega, have mercy on me"

Category:

Film & Animation

Tags:

• Michael
• Bolton
• Comedian
• Stand
• up
• Wizard
• tutorial

[pepperinmyeye]

YESS!!!

(this is vik)