The elves should be ashamed. In these hard economic times, there are millions of Americans would give their right arm to have a job, and here are the elves complaining about too much work. Don't come crying to Obama when Santa wants a $7 billion bailout.
Santa's sELFish ways have made life hELL For us all. Up here, it's just one shovELFul of snow after another. We stack toys on the shELVES day and night until our little hands blister. That is why I'm wearing the insignia of the Revolt of the ELVES on my lapEL For all to see.
Too long and too hard have we toiled, payed but a pittance, while Santa's pELF grows steadily. I would quit, but I know of no other ELF-jobs in the area, and the Lappish wELFare system lacks much to be desired.
And so much for sELF-indulgence! I have neither the time nor the money to pursue my hobbies of making modEL Fir trees and sculpting dELFt Christmas mugs.
Or perhaps I should just relieve mysELF of my post and head southwards. Oh, how I have longed to lie under a deciduous tree: a hazEL For once surrounded by angEL Flowers and damsELFlies, as enchanting carillon scales waft from the bELFry of a countryside church.
And so I bid you an fond farewELL From the tELPHerages of Lapland (soon to be PhiladEL PHia if I move there). Or, as we say in our Sami tongue (Sørsamisk ÅarjEL): Vuojnnalip!
On December twELFth and thirteenth of December 2008, at the Athenaeum Theatre, Chicago, my sELFless ELF-mates and mysELF will come together to rebEL For the sake of all ELFkind.
The only way to help the elves is to go to the concert! We all must do our part!
sophiesugarpaws 3 years ago
The elves should be ashamed. In these hard economic times, there are millions of Americans would give their right arm to have a job, and here are the elves complaining about too much work. Don't come crying to Obama when Santa wants a $7 billion bailout.
hicontact 3 years ago
'dos elves had bedder be watchin' out. Santa ain't gonna stand for much of this protestin' crap for very long. nope, not a chance.
me and my henchmen brudders are gonna hit 'em where it hoirts. big time. and don't you forget it neither.
hey Norman Elff, yeah you, listen up schmuck before it's too late.
Paolo the Rat
pshoun 3 years ago
Santa's sELFish ways have made life hELL For us all. Up here, it's just one shovELFul of snow after another. We stack toys on the shELVES day and night until our little hands blister. That is why I'm wearing the insignia of the Revolt of the ELVES on my lapEL For all to see.
[Continued]
yfructose 3 years ago
Too long and too hard have we toiled, payed but a pittance, while Santa's pELF grows steadily. I would quit, but I know of no other ELF-jobs in the area, and the Lappish wELFare system lacks much to be desired.
And so much for sELF-indulgence! I have neither the time nor the money to pursue my hobbies of making modEL Fir trees and sculpting dELFt Christmas mugs.
Perhaps Christmas should be cancelled!
[Continued]
yfructose 3 years ago
Or perhaps I should just relieve mysELF of my post and head southwards. Oh, how I have longed to lie under a deciduous tree: a hazEL For once surrounded by angEL Flowers and damsELFlies, as enchanting carillon scales waft from the bELFry of a countryside church.
And so I bid you an fond farewELL From the tELPHerages of Lapland (soon to be PhiladEL PHia if I move there). Or, as we say in our Sami tongue (Sørsamisk ÅarjEL): Vuojnnalip!
Norman The ELF.
yfructose 3 years ago
A plea to each and every sELF-interested ELF,
On December twELFth and thirteenth of December 2008, at the Athenaeum Theatre, Chicago, my sELFless ELF-mates and mysELF will come together to rebEL For the sake of all ELFkind.
Come and join us!
[Continued]
yfructose 3 years ago
Brilliant marketing strategy! -Member of the Silicon Valley Gay Men's Chorus!
dormouse25 3 years ago