Social anxiety in grad school

I was actually going to talk about starting the PhD, so I started talking a little bit about social anxiety because it was, and still is a problem. Then I decided half way through making the video that I'd talk a bit more about it. There is a lot more to it than this, I'm only talking about what happens at uni.

I hate to talk about my anxiety to people because it makes me even more nervous. It's actually very stupid, what I am afraid of is that people will see how afraid I am. Will people see my hands shake? Can people hear my heart beat? Am I blushing? Talking to a camera is a lot easier because no one is watching these things. It makes me even more nervous that this is all happening at the psychology department.

I have had this problem for a long time, but haven't really made videos about it. I actually have made a few, but i haven't uploaded them. I almost wasn't going to upload this one. I have had talk therapy and taken SSRIs for it as well as for depressive episodes that I've had through out life. Unfortunately the thing that works the best for me is alcohol. Even that can sometimes make me even more anxious, so it's a gamble.

Although I'm lucky as it's mild to moderate in severity, so I am able to live a fairly functional life, especially thanks to a lot of things being done online. And there a few friends who I feel very comfortable around and can do a lot more things around them. They probably would not know about my problem at all. People are affected by social anxiety in all different ways, and it's a very common disorder. There are people who are just shy to people who are too afraid to leave their houses in case they might bump into somebody.

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• nervousneuron
• social
• anxiety
• anxious
• nervous
• PhD
• psychology
• panic
• attack
• fear
• phobia

[akallstar5]

ooh yikes, a PhD in philosophy... man just throw your money away. Good luck getting a job.

[nervousneuron]

@akallstar5

lol, PhD stands for doctor of philosophy. It's actually in neuroscience.

[poshko41]

Instead, get RATIONAL with the problem. Come up with statements to say to yourself when you feel that urge to mope or get frustrated. "Wait a minute... I'm having those thoughts again that I know aren't good for me. It's this habit of berating myself that keeps this negative cycle in place. I'm not going to let it happen anymore. I'm going to approach this calmly and rationally even if I don't feel like it."

[nervousneuron]

@poshko41

Getting rational is good, and what you've explained sounds like the basis for cognitive behavioural therapy. It's much easier said than done. Most of the time, I know it's stupid. Rationally, so what if someone was to make fun of me eating? It's not my problem, they'd be the ones being dicks. Haha, actually when things like that happen, I tend to get less anxious. Anxiety for me is all about the 'what if something really bad will happen? [cont]

[nervousneuron]

[cont]

Who knows what that something is though'. Anxiety feeds on the unknown.

A lot of the thoughts are intrusive and I can recognise them. Which makes it not as bad as it could be. There is always the debate of doing something and putting up with anxiety VS avoiding something but also avoiding the anxiety.

[jedimastervandar]

Hey, I found your video because I've been looking up Social Anxiety Disorder (because I think I have some form of it or something) and while you were talking, I found that I could relate to what you talked about (except cutting classes, since I'd be more nervous about missing class than the class itself), so I found it very enlightening to hear someone talk about their experiences with Social Anxiety. I'm really glad you posted this video!

[nervousneuron]

Thanks for the comment :)

Everyone's different when it comes to social anxiety, and it's normal to worry about embarrassing yourself, etc but it becomes social anxiety disorder when it interferes with your life.

[RubiconXing]

I used to be this way until I started smoking marijuana and empathizing more with people, seeing what makes us similar rather than what separates, intimidates or alienates us from each other. That realization (and it came slowly, with observation and practice) profoundly changed me. The best advice I could give is to see the other person *as* you, someone you *can* commnicate with ("seeing yourself in every stranger's eyes"). Of course it also helps to "know thyself" and communicate emotions :)

[kudeki]

Hi nervousneuron, I'm almost over my anxiety condition which plagued me for 4 years and totally ruined my ability to enjoy my undergraduate experience. What I'd suggest to you is to look into The Linden Method, which is the strategy which has basically gotten me completely over my anxiety completely. You can also check out reddit . com / seduction which is really more a place for guys to just learn to get along better socially to meet girls -I've heard women say they learn a lot from that too.

[oneprincesslea]

I have so many similar social problems in my PhD program, but I have never been diagnosed. Thank you for posting this, I guess I am a psycho like I thought I was :)

[stripthatfatweightlo]

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