Attention K-Mart Shoppers

Well, what do you know, it seems that after a long continuous period of preoccupation with important matters (AKA, lethargy), Tatterdemalion has made another video. That's Tatterdemalion, the man who doesn't know the meaning of the term "first person".

I like to think of this as a poem, even though by most standards it's probably not. Most of the poems in my other poem videos incorporate some sort of meter and rhyming pattern (in fact, it's mostly meter and rhyming pattern, with the words themselves coming in third place). Now, the problem with writing like this is that over time it can get to be dull and repetitive (if it isn't from the get-go).

It would seem that the logical alternative to allow for a break from this format would be free verse. I've decided to take this a step forward and skip free verse altogether, moving on to no-verse. It's kind of like free verse, except it's missing some of the basic distinguishing elements of poetry.

This video is indeed a part of what I have dubbed the Ongoing War Against Suburban Sprawl and the Synthetic Culture of America. What this is is a campaign against suburban "culture", Midwestern America, demographics, capitalism, and anything else I don't like, consisting entirely of me complaining until someone tells me to shut up. Once someone tells me to shut up, I'll complain about that person instead.

Just a side note, for those of you who are interested, the reason they call it suburban sprawl is because the parking lot is five times the size of the store, whatever that store may be. Scary, but true.

Category:

Entertainment

Tags:

• Poem
• Kmart
• discount
• department
• store
• superstore
• megastore
• su

[paulbhensley]

THAT was totally hillarious! it's an excellent attack on big box stores but kmart is trying to get away from that image. i just wish you would have attacked walmart instead.

[TheTatterdemalion2]

Attacking Wal-Mart would be nice. But then I couldn't use the phrase "Attention K-Mart Shoppers," could I?

[qwandiddy]

better than dirty stanky ass Supercenter Walmart. But Super Target is beautiful.

[JeffersonDinedAlone]

@TheTatterdemalion2 Sure you could. "Attention K-Mart shoppers, wouldn't you really rather shop at Wal-Mart?"

[2ndrealityprojectfan]

...Must...Resist...! ...Aw, what the hell. WELCOME TO COCK-MART!  SPECIAL ON MANCHOWDER IN AISLE SIX!

[METALMAN4Wii]

@Sallyallie89 Dam Right were not there Slaves....! 

[Sallyallie89]

@Sallyallie89 say*

[Sallyallie89]

@METALMAN4Wii lol, good response. I'm the same way. When my time is up, I want out of there asap. I could care less about the extra 5 or 10 cents. Besides, people like him have ALL DAY to come to Kmart. It's like "Hey buddy, you had from 8am until 10pm to shop. That's 14 hours. If you aren't free at all within those 14 hours then shop online!!!" ... I'd love to stay that, but I'd get fired of course =p

[METALMAN4Wii]

@Sallyallie89 He said your making Money aren't you I said no Kmart is making Money. im making maybe an extra 15¢ Ringing you up and I think I said I rather be home playing my Gamecube. it's being 2001 at the time and I was trying to beat Luigi's Mansion which I did in 2 days....!

[Sallyallie89]

@METALMAN4Wii lol, what did he say in response?

[METALMAN4Wii]

@Sallyallie89 I told him when we say 1 minute till closing we mean it and next time were not going to ring him up....!

[Sallyallie89]

@METALMAN4Wii My store wouldn't have done that. They would have just had the guy go to the service desk because if I'm correct my managers have to stay there for an extra 15 minutes after closing to do whatever it is they have to do, while cashiers leave. If I had to do what you had to do I would have treated that customer like s***. Not to the point where it's overly noticeable, but just enough to let him know he's an a**.

[METALMAN4Wii]

@Sallyallie89 I had one guy pop out from hiding 15 minutes after my store closed with a cart full of stuff I remember it was over $200 worth. because my asshole Manager made me put my till back in and ring the guy up. I wanted to say to him "dam why don't you just get on your hands and knees and give the man a blow job why your at it". but I would have been fired for sure.....!