ProjectX

This was my shot at combining Dadaism with structure. It's difficult to dial down intentionality. If one is told not to do something then that "something" becomes a more heavily focused on idea. Don't think of the color red.
Did you think of the color red?

I've combined the days events along with past or current thoughts.

ProjectX


The only thing that occurred was the event of sleep.
Not sleep itself but the moments before I fell into that slumber.
The moments of the day, thoughts of my past, and fears in my present are what challenges my body to fight off what's natural.
I lie awake for hours but appear as though I'm sleeping.

I cannot establish the difference between the haunting feeling that I'm alone
and the haunting feeling that I'm not alone.

All of the things that keep me awake become tied together to create an endless rope that never brings me to rest.

On this particular night my Grandmother keeps coming to mind. She has visited the emergency room twice this week. I see her glowing angelically but I fear of her fate. I try hard to fall asleep as she tries hard not to....for fear of sleeping forever.

I also fear of my own fate, which is why there are multiple figures outside pointing at me through my house. Even ghosts can wear masks. Nothing is ever what it appears to be.

Apples are consuming my thoughts. My kitchen is currently home to a hundred and I do nothing to them but stare. They will be the death of me, which is perhaps why they roll down the stairs that I happen to fall off of. Apples are also a symbolism for life. Ironic isn't it?


There are images of a young couple kissing. This represents youth and the idea and ability to move forwards. Where as the images of the older people represent the slowing down process of life. The younger couple and the older people can also be tied together with the dying bird and the more animated ones that spread their wings and take off for flight.
The flying birds also symbolize thoughts. I use them in a way to suggest that negative thoughts are similar to them. Let them fly around your mind but don't let them nest.
Also my dog killed a bird the day of filming. I believe because something is smaller than you it doesn't make it more insignificant. The death of innocence tortures me. But this is more inherent duality. Killing is a natural instinct for an animal. I feel that's wrong yet at the same time I give him my love. So what does that say about me?

Eating and then purging: I take things in for a moment than spit them out. I have a hard time mentally holding onto short-term things. I feel uneducated and that I can't learn much these days, yet I keep trying. Also I'm presently on a meal plan so I'm consumed with the idea of gluttony.


ENJOY!! or don't :(

AUDIO: Crimin'& Dealin' by Clint Mansell and the Kronos Quartet

Category:

Film & Animation

Tags:

• Clint Mansell
• Kronos Quartet
• apples
• ghost
• masks
• stairs
• old
• young
• kissing
• alive
• dying
• death
• birds
• flying
• dog
• editing