Taylor Lautner and MCR story Ch 3

TAYLOR’S POV
After the little chat with Gerard, they got right down to business. I walked over to the front of the stage and sat on the plastic chairs. They were all truly amazing performers and you could tell that they enjoyed it. Gerard tried to explain it to me once. He said when he was on stage he could let all his frustrations and emotions out. I wish I could do that, I’ve always kept them in.

Everything. I keep it all in. To this day nobody knows what my father did to me or that my big brother died for me. I don’t tell anybody because I try to keep myself from even thinking about any of it. I don’t like the pity people I don’t even know give me because my mom died or that I watched my girlfriend die.

People should mind their own business and leave me the fuck alone. After Sarah died the doctors looked at me like I was going to jump off a bridge or some shit. Just because I don’t cry doesn’t mean Im in denial. Im perfectly fine.

“Taylor! Hey buddy snap out of it!” I heard Frank yell.

I flinched a little at the sound of his voice. Huh I was that out of it.

“Yeah Frankie?”

“You okay dude you zoned out on us.” He sounded concerned. I really didn’t care.

“Yes Frank Im fine. I gotta piss.” I say as my excuse to bolt. I walked normally toward the backstage door, once through the door I ran to the closest bathroom. I slammed the door and locked the lock.It was a single bathroom.

Good.

I don’t know what came over me. I just started crying for no reason. Gut wrenching sobs was more like it. The sobs jolted my body with every breath. I started to freak out. Why does my chest hurt so bad?

God! It hurts! Not a physical hurt really just a hurt. Why won’t it stop?

I was still shaking as I sat on the closed toilet. I know how to get rid of it. I rummaged through the medicine cabinet.

What public bathroom has a medicine cabinet?
Right now I’m glad this one does.
It took me longer than I thought it would take to find what I wanted.

The razorblade. I finally found it.

I rolled up my jacket sleeve with my shaky hand and took a deep breath.

I put the razor blade to my wrist and made one swift motion from one side of my wrist to the other. Immediately the pain in my chest went away. Thank god. I looked down at my now red wrist and smiled.

You might think Im crazy but it made the pain go away and for that I was thankful. It took me only seconds to stop shaking. I rinsed my hand and put the blade in my pocket. I didn’t want them getting suspicious so I didn’t wipe my tears.

I walked back to the stage area and they were all still taking a break.

“Hey guys.” I say casually, like I just didn’t cut my wrist open.

Their heads shot up and looked at my tear stained face. They had frowns on their faces.

“Are you really okay?” Mikey asked.

“Now I am. I didn’t know how much of it I was keeping in.” I say, it was the truth but I just didn’t tell ALL the truth.

“Oh kay well we’re done until tonight so do you want to go back to the bus?” Gerard asked still worried. I could always fool everyone but him.

Category:

Entertainment

Tags:

• taylor
• lautner
• MCR
• gerard
• mikey
• ray
• story
• bob
• frank
• OneTrueMedia