Chestival - Blind Punter

Based on the classic original, this is the Chestival 2010 version courtesy of Cheltenham Paul.

The Blind Punter

I've been a blind punter for many a year,
And I've spent all me money on sh*te tips and beer.
But now I'm returning with Noels sound advice,
And Ill have plenty winners, each one at a price.

And it's no, nay, never!
No nay never no more.
Will I play the blind punter?
No never no more.

I went to a bookie I used to frequent,
And I told the sly b*stard my money was spent.
He laughed when I uttered my nap of the day,
When I said it was Noels, the fat c*nt ran away.

And it's no, nay, never!
No nay never no more.
Will I play the blind punter?
No never no more.

And from my pocket I took wads of cash,
And I poured LPR with a splish and a splash.
The lads in the Miller said Howve you done that?,
I said Noels the best tipster since Mickey The Hat.

And it's no, nay, never!
No nay never no more.
Will I play the blind punter?
No never no more.

I'll go over to Cheltenham with confidence high,
And with this mans help make the bookmakers cry.
And if you all listen, whatever the place,
Then hell keep tipping winners from Southwell to Naas!

And it's no, nay, never!
No nay never no more.
Will I play the blind punter?
No never no more.

© Cheltenham Paul/Chestival Sept 2009

Category:

Sports

Tags:

• Chestival
• Blind
• Punter

[vinolrj]

A remarkable melody. But more importantly, who is this legendary Noel chap, and can I have some of his tips please?!

[Grubby78]

An instant classic. Is there an album out any time soon?