LegendOfTheTurd

It happened long before my time,
It long ago occurred.
The scary tale that's told in rhyme,
The Legend of the Turd.

They say the man that found it first
Has never been the same;
They say he dropped like one that's cursed
And couldn't recall his name.

They say the dreadful stink so strong,
Quite took his breath away.
They say the penetrating pong
Still lingers to this day.

And so it was the tale began
That long ago occurred;
And this is how the telling ran
The Legend of the Turd.

They say it was two feet in length,
And stuck above the rim.
They say it took a hero's strength
To face a sight so grim.

The snake that eats an egg complete
Is stretched beyond belief;
For he who strained upon the seat
He passed a great relief.

But what to do to clear the loo?
T'was really quite absurd.
There never was another poo
Like this amazing turd.

They poked it with a pointed stick,
To push it round the bend.
They poked it slow, they poked it quick,
The turd would not descend.

They fetched some bleach to do the job,
It merely turned it white.
They gathered in a massive mob
To join the fiercesome fight.

By dawn they flagged and faced defeat;
It really was absurd,
For still it rose above the seat,
The Legend of the Turd.

And then he came with plunger black,
The fixer of the loo.
He came in fury to attack,
That massive stinky poo.

The crowd they cheered and gathered round
As near as nose allowed.
And listened to the dreadful sound
As fixer swore aloud.

He plunged the brown and gooey heart
Of that the French call merde,
And with a slurp it did depart
The Legend of the Turd.

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• Poem
• Ballad
• Ben Johnson
• Turd

[vechmaster]

Story of my life.......

[jayguy1234]

LOL this if funny

[JRiftin]

Brilliant!

[JadedArtisan]

Its just so wrong it can't help but be right... great poem.

[jayguy1234]

this video is HILARIOUS!!

[jayguy1234]

how could anybody not comment on this video