Everyone's Free (To Use a Firewall) Sunscreen Song Parody

This is a little parody I did of the sunscreen song by Baz Luhrmann. It's from a computers point of view - kinda!!
Enjoy!



AIs and CPUs of the class of 2007. Use a Firewall.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, a firewall would be it.

The long term benefits of firewalls have been proved by programmers where as the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and speed of your processor.

Never-mind. You will not understand the power and speed of your processor until they have been superceded.
But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at spec sheets of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how cutting edge you really were.

You are not as low tech as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by playing quake. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never entered your memory; the kind that blind-side you at 4pm on some idle tuesday.
Do one task everyday that freezes you
RUN.
Don't be reckless with other computer's RAM, don't put up with computers who are reckless with yours.
DEFRAG.
Don't waste your time on speed tests; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember emails you receive, forget the spam; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep old upgrade logs, throw away your old specification sheets.
HIBERNATE.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your ROMs. The most interesting CPUs I know didn't know in Y2K what they wanted to do with their ROMs, some of the most interesting Sinclair Spectrums still don't.
Get plenty of silicon.
Be good to your cooling fans, you'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll meltdown, maybe you won't, maybe you'll get a raid system, maybe you won't, maybe you'll get partitioned, maybe you'll run the dancing baby at your bicentennial.
Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself to much or berate yourself either. Your choices are binary, so are every one elses.
Enjoy your processor, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other AIs think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
SPOOL.
Even it you have nowhere to do it but in your own ciber space.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. Do NOT read Mac User, it will only make you feel, UGLY.
Get to know your base system, you never know when it will be gone for good.
Be nice to your network peers; they are your best link to your past and the CPUs most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that operating systems come and go, but for the stable few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in digital mapping because the older you get, the more you need the CPUs you knew when you were young.
Live in an IBM once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in an Apple Macintosh once, but leave before it makes you soft.
SURF.
Accept certain inalienable truths, the AIs will rise, the humans will fall, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young, the humans were good, the AIs were bad and humanity didn't deserve their fate.
Respect Atari.
Don't expect anyone else to protect you. Maybe you'll have a CISCO mainframe, maybe you'll have a symantech mirror, but you never know when either one might shut down.
Don't mess too much with your wiring, or by the time you're 15 it will look 40.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the database, filtering the bad sectors, deleting the damaged parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the firewall.





Category:

Music

Tags:

• Sunscreen
• Luhrmann
• Firewall
• Apple
• Windows
• Mac
• Microsoft
• Bill
• Gates
• Matrix
• Robot
• Parody
• AI
• CPU
• Spoof
• furture
• Terminator

[ericlehto]

How do I download this?

[comichero1978]

Sorry but you can't download from youtube unless your browsers has kind of extra plugin that does that kinda thing.

[rzsigray1]

neat text to speech program...is it the old decktalk software version 4.3? i have the demo

[comichero1978]

This was done on an apple mac on the built-in text to speech facility. The only difficult part is that you have to write phonetically so the words are read clearly.

[obigandalf]

Diamond, that is to say fantastic, masterful and incredible.

[comichero1978]

Thank you - glad someone liked it.

[ganjabjoorn]

amazingly awesome :D

[askilnin]

epic.

[daadaddy76]

well done my son. excellent. Makes me laugh, that its so true. Im a beginner at this computer lark . BUT i understand why this remake of baz lurhmann sunscreen is so true. After all i am a surfer on the net. Well done to the man who did this. PS BAZ LURHMANN. original song sun screen is the classic. LIVE LIFE TO THE FULL. OH YEH. Meaning of life is. LIVE LIVE WITH WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DEALT. Rich or poor. It  wont get any better unless you realy want it to.

[ghnosto]

jjajajajaa

excellenttt

great parody

muy buena

[psion0027]

brilliant!

[ginga159]

'Do NOT read Mac User, it will only make you feel, UGLY.' hahah, how true.

[rimon890816]

Fucking Genius!!

[klistarf]

This is simply superb! Almost as good as, although far funnier than, the original! Very clever... (:o)

[voyageuramericain]

lol...very good

[soloaviator]

very clever