Hovis Advert CAPSTICK COMES HOME

CAPSTICK COMES HOME - Tony Capstick and Carlton Main/Frickley Colliery Band. (1981)
'The New World Symphony' by Dvorak,
CAPSTICK COMES HOME

I'll never forget that first day at t'pit. Me an' mi father worked a seventy two hour shift, an' then we walked home forty three mile through t'snow in us bare feet, huddled inside us clothes med out o' old sacks.

Eventually we trudged over t'hill until wi could see t'street light twinklin' in our village. Mi father smiled down at mi through t'icicles hangin' off his nose. "Nearly home now lad", he said.

We stumbled into t'house and stood there freezin' cold and tired out, shiverin' and miserable, in front o' t' meagre fire. Any road, mi mam says "Cheer up, lads. I've got you some nice brown bread and butter for yer tea."

Ee, mi father went crackers. He reached out and gently pulled mi mam towards 'im by t'throat. "You big fat, idle ugly wart", he said. "You gret useless spawny-eyed parrot-faced wazzock." ('E had a way wi words, mi father. He'd bin to college, y'know). "You've been out playin' bingo all afternoon instead o' gettin' some proper snap ready for me an' this lad", he explained to mi poor, little, purple-faced mam.

Then turnin' to me he said "Arthur", (He could never remember mi name), "here's half a crown. Nip down to t'chip 'oyl an' get us a nice piece o' 'addock for us tea. Man cannot live by bread alone." He were a reyt tater, mi father. He said as 'ow workin' folk should have some dignity an' pride an' self respect, an' as 'ow they should come home to summat warm an' cheerful.

An' then he threw mi mam on t'fire.

We didn't 'ave no tellies or shoes or bedclothes. We med us own fun in them days. Do you know, when I were a lad you could get a tram down into t'town, buy three new suits an' an ovvercoat, four pair o' good boots, go an' see George Formby at t'Palace Theatre, get blind drunk, 'ave some steak an' chips, bunch o' bananas an' three stone o' monkey nuts an' still 'ave change out of a farthing.

We'd lots o' things in them days they 'aven't got today - rickets, diptheria, Hitler and my, we did look well goin' to school wi' no backside in us trousers an' all us little 'eads painted purple because we 'ad ringworm.

They don't know they're born today!!!


Tony Capstick
1944 - 2003

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• people
• history
• comedy
• fun
• HOVIS

[BuddyFantastic]

This certainly is a blast from the past, last heard this back in 81 when i was too young to appreciate Mr Capsticks humour. I love it even more now

[cliftonbird]

@robbie0507 he came from Mexbrough actually

[robbie0507]

RIP Tony Capstick - Sheffield's Finest !!

[steamwally]

Here here!

[Clivepom]

This is England. I wish the liberal minded, pro-multicultural gits I seem to be surrounded by would recognise that. Remember what England was, and thank god, in some parts, still is.

[GloriDays]

I'm in awe. magic, magic, magic, magic!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GLORIOUS music, words, images. Wonderful compilation!!!!!!

[PM1970]

This was actually a Top 10 hit in April 1981 (in the UK) as a double A side with "The Sheffield Grinder"

[MonSwon]

Who made this? Was it you? This is brilliant. Its obviously comparable to the monty python sketches, not that Im saying your copying it, this has some of its own quality, its good, grabed me ma by her throat, brilliant

[CinnAlla]

Ah... I remember the Grumbleweeds doing their impersonation of Joe Gladwyn (Wally Batty from Last of the Summer Wine)... "'E werre a grreat bakerr werre our dad".

[ScrittiSparkle]

i got the record from e bay today,ee i was so happy wi what i got,i put it on t.record player,and played it 4 times,mr tony capstik brought such happines to me and im so glad i heard his record,all my best and all my love to him,im so sorry that he passed away,a legend if ever there was one,xxx