A Family Living With Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders / Educational Video

Public domain video. The Story Of Iyal. Source: National Center on Birth Defects and Developmental Disabilities. A mother tells her compelling story about a family living with fetal alcohol spectrum disorders. Every family has unique experiences, challenges and successes. The intent is not to endorse specific interventions, but to share one family's story and hope.

The Story of Iyal: [Donnie Kanter Winokur] We started seeing a lot of hyperactivity and emotionality so we started getting a little concerned. When we first saw the developmental pediatrician, he suspected that there was an underlying syndrome due to fetal alcohol exposure. A diagnosis gives you some validation. We can say this is a disability that is a result of a birth defect.

Living with a child with fetal alcohol syndrome is like living with a constant anticipation of a hurricane. Over time you understand, on so many different levels, how this impacts not only your child, but your family.

It's very hard to be a sibling of a child with fetal alcohol spectrum disorders. It's hard as a parent not to put this burden on your typical kid because it's like you want to say, "You're the easy one, don't act out."

We know there is no magic bullet; there is no one thing that is going to change everything. Having some OT and speech and physical therapy certainly helped. And you want to try to teach social skills to your child.

But I think the intervention that I am most excited about is that we obtained a service dog. Iyal has an unconditional companion. One of the things we've learned as parents is that you want to try to create external supports for your child so that they can feel successful in any environment possible.

The earlier you have a diagnosis you can start intervention. If you see some behaviors in your kids that might look like what I'm describing, you certainly would want to make sure that you have a pediatrician examine your child, and if you're not hearing things that feel intuitively like they're answering your questions or your concerns, that you go to some sort of specialist, either a child neurologist or developmental pediatrician.
You have to look at this in the face so that you can help your child. I think it's important to tell the truth, to talk about what this is, and not to be ashamed because if you're going to teach your child to be an advocate for themselves, you have to say, This is my kid; part of my kid is that he has a disability, a profound disability."
Every parent wants their child to be happy and certainly that's what we want for Iyal. I think finding happiness within the context of this disability is going to depend a lot on Iyal feeling safe. Because he's so vulnerable it is going to be our lifelong job to keep him protected and safe.
There are ports in the storm. You just have to look for them.

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[elizabethgarman1969]

May I borrow this video for a report I have on FASD? I won't use it until I have your permission! God bless!

[rosaryfilms]

@elizabethgarman1969 - yes, I apologize for the delayed response -- but you can use this video. thanks

[SkepticalBliss]

Aww - how sad. Hopefully science will find a solution as they always have in the past. Thanks for putting this out there...

[rosaryfilms]

@SkepticalBliss - you are welcome!

[3in1Godisnumber1]

Great video, thanks for uploading, God Bless :)

[rosaryfilms]

@3in1Godisnumber1 - thank you for your comments

[TragicArchAngel]

He has a disability because bitch couldn't keep away from the liquor when she was pregnant. The mother heavily damaged the quality of life her child would experience before he had was born. This woman makes me sick, she makes it seem like she's a great parent dealing with a disability. She did that to him and should be ashamed of what she did.

[HearingEveryRhyme]

@SkepticalBliss Well if a parent doesn't drink, then it doesn't happen. It is the fault of whomever the biological mother is and is is despicable that anyone would do this to their child. The disregard for the child is appalling in my opinion.

The more research we can do with stem cells will lead to many more developments and treatments for neurological disabilities, as chemicals can only do so much, but they cannot repair damage.

[keybladealchemist88]

excuse me but i was wondering would anyone call it bad if someone kept stealing things from someone who has a bit of a memory problem due to FAS any comments would be very helpful

[TheLuckymomof3boys]

@TragicArchAngel before you say such horrible things, why don't you find out the facts. It only makes you look ignorant! This mom adopted this boy when he was a baby. The fact that he had ANY issues was not disclosed to them. She seems to be an amazing mother, trying to ease the pain her son has to endure everyday, at no fault of his own! I understand your harshness, but before you call her names you should have done a litte research!

[SkepticalBliss]

@fanfave101 You got that right! Sometimes the best solutions are the obvious ones.

[fanfave101]

@SkepticalBliss there is a solution. Dont drink while pregnate , or breast feeding or if your planning on becomming pregnate. Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders is 100% preventable.

[gnr2391]

I think a mother who gives birth to a child with FAS should have her tubes tied. I don't care that it's her own body. Your rights end when they affect other's rights, and the mother who drinks ruins her child's right to a better life. If anyone disagrees with me, I encourage you to engage in CONSTRUCTIVE, RESPECTFUL debate with me to find better solutions. Comment a reply or messaging me is cool.

[TragicArchAngel]

@thetruthergirls I was drunk and bitter that night, probably didn't even notice they were of different ethnicities. :D

[thetruthergirls]

@TragicArchAngel The parents are obviously Jewish and besides the fact that Jews don't drink, the kid looks Native, plus there are no early baby pictures. He's probably adopted. I was thinking the same thing, what mother would put herself in a PSA like that after causing such harm to her kid?

[thedisneyfanatic101]

I have an adopted sister with fas. This video describes her very well. I'm just thankful to know we aren't the only family dealing with these types of behaviors every day.