Darth Vader Robs Bank In Long Island

It seems the Empire has fallen on hard times. Presumably to get finishing funds for his latest Death Star, Darth Vader—or a man pretending to be Darth Vader?—was reduced to robbing a bank on Long Island this morning. Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun—as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat—the fallen Jedi demanded cash.

It's unclear whether he also found their lack of faith disturbing, but one Rebel policeman says, "The teller complied with the robber's demands and gave him money from the drawer." Vader is described as 6 feet, 2 inches tall, also wearing camouflage pants, and was last seen boarding a starfighter headed in the direction of Long Island's sinister Sith stronghold, in Valley Stream. (Isn't this also where Improv Everywhere has their headquarters?)

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• bank
• chase

[PsychoDaveFilms]

The force is strong with this video :)

[GordyGripes]

@PsychoDaveFilms resistance is futile =)

[northstar2007]

you can dress up as anything in new york and not be noticed, people just dont care there anymore lol

[GordyGripes]

@northstar2007 ya know I think you are right. maybe I was thinking back when people actually noticed stuff LOL Thanks for subbing it was a little lonely around here haha

[ulfenstyle]

there is a reason why i commented here!

[MrHomelessgnome]

i live on long island