Valenswine.

So I didn't have a Valentine to dedicate any grievously embarrassing displays of affection to, so this is for any displaced soul out there - you are all welcome to be my Valenswine!

I guess this little number is a little about poking fun at Valentines day (and men, in general, ahaha), and a little about admitting my debilitating loneliness... No, not really. But I don't know. It's just another exercise in attempting to craft some fun!

So in this video, I am handing you some sincerity coupled with some stupidity, with the hopes that you may get a smile out of it. If even just a little one. My dance moves are embarrassing, and I, I know this. So you better appreciate that I'm putting my own dignity on hold if only to attempt to appease some lonely hearts. So, from me to you, have a fantastic day. Lots of sex, drugs and rock n roll (only for the responsible, consenting adults, mind you). And by the previous statement, I may actually mean love. Lot's of love.

Happy Valenswines Day, porkchops xx

Sorry that the quality is so poor. I filmed this without checking my settings, and obviously didn't realise that I left the camera ridiculously over-exposed. Eh.

Blog:
http://www.babyporridge.blogspot.com

Twitter:
http://www.twitter.com/babyporridge

Email:
babyporridge@gmail.com

Lyrics, etc etc

Well it's that time of year again.
The lonesome take off their coats and
try to stay afloat in baths they draw for themselves
and not to share with anyone else.
Yeah, Happy Valentines day.

That's not to say just cos i'm alone, i'm lonesome, i'm alonesome?
But most of the time i think the only kind of attachments we need
are the email kind. Here,
have a .jpeg or are you more .gif inclined?

Just this once, I would love a Valenswine
Some filthy chauvinistic pig of a man
Who'd send me flowers
...Addressed to 'Suzanne' :/

Maybe we'd go for dinner in a fancy little place
If 'fancy little place' is the same as a high-security prisoner's base.

Cupid please, I'm down on my knees.
I'm as sincere as processed cheese
Please send me a Valenswine
I wouldn't complain even without critical acclaim,
Just come in time.

Just this once, I would love a Valenswine
A handsome schmuck who'll tell all his mates that
my ass is freaking huge
...Through status updates.

Maybe we'd go ice-skating on a thinly frozen lake,
i'd fall through the ice and slice off my thighs.
He'd laugh and say you look like chopped steak.

Cupid please, I'm down on my knees.
I'm as sincere as processed cheese
Please send me a Valenswine
I wouldn't complain even without critical acclaim,
Just come in time.

Just this once, I would love a Valenswine
Preferably not from the jerk assembly line.

Category:

Music

Tags:

• babyporridge
• nikki malvar
• original song
• valentine
• valentines day
• valenswine
• novelty song

[allison2811]

you got a classic voice, the kind that belongs in old 50's musicals :)

[sockswarmmyfeet]

Why aren't you famous? You have an amazing voice and style.

[scrumblescump]

you need a boyfriend love..

[justinsheridan55]

Thanks for the smile:D

[jinkings]

do you have an ep or something? cause i would buy it

[howaboutjenna]

you are lovely.

[Chris0makes0movies]

What is the name of the stock music you used in your "irreparable psychological damage, pls" that communitychannel also uses? (ps you are a great singer)

[calterojr]

ela atravessa na percussão, pena! :/

[mickeybabbe1]

I am it. Your Valenswine! Oink Oink Oink. I oink you~ ! oink oink. Valenswine am I to you.

[AngelAndRandomness]

you should do more vids like this, they're really good!