Published on Jul 18, 2013
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Woah der Jerome slow your roll you're looking at me kind of loco right meow and I think you need to pipe it down a little bit because you got the crazy eyes and speaking of that I've been watching this show about drugs and it's blowing my mind because that shit cray, like all the people that love heroin and meth and stuff and live in trap houses and just do drugs all day, come on man let's be friends don't do that, I'll even make you dinner what do you like macaroni and cheese? Maybe some chicken fingers? I mean I don't really make great chicken fingers but I can certainly heat you up some frozen ones just don't go shoot heroin in your arm that would be fantastic because I want to hug you one million times and then one million more times and today I did one million space pull ups not even real pull ups because I'm not strong enough to do those yet, well yet is relative because when I was a kid and did gymnastics I could do like 8 billion but that's because I was a little peanut thing and weighed like 11 pounds so lifting yourself up was like throwing a banana at a radiator like it gives a fuck so no big deal but those muscles things that make up my back feel like owwwy and I wish there was a band aid I could put on them to make them feel much better like ranch dressing and then I could skip through the woods and find all the nature and wildlife even better than the tour guide and even embarrass him when I'm like, hey mister man leading this group that makes a living doing this, look at this bad ass little caterpillar I just found, what's it called, and he's all like uhhh.. well I'm not sure, and then I scream out DONT WORRY EVERYONE I KNOW ITS A IO MOTH CATERPILLAR HAHAHA THIS MOTHERFUCKER!! And everyone's all like oh what a bright child you are and I'm like I know that's why I'm a nature sensei and I'm so kickass at knowledge it's not even funny and hey don't eat that because it's poisonous but I'll show you want you can eat and you can also drink your own urine because of aliens. It's a fact. Don't even talk to me about it because it's so spaceshippy and ottery that you won't even understand what I'm about to drop on you homie. I drank a coffee.
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