Drake Blaize - The Moon is a Buffoon

The world of astrology has been rocked to its rocky foundations. The practitioners of the method of ascribing personality traits and predictions about individual's futures from the positions of the celestial bodies, have been shocked by the revelation that they might have been getting it all wrong for the last 26,000 years. Of course, this is not a very long time compared to the age of those heavenly orbs but is quite a significant period if you have been basing major life decisions on what your horoscopes have been saying. If you are Aries, for instance, and you married a Leo because that is what your astrological symbol is reported to be most compatible with, and it didn't work out like a Walt Disney cartoon, that may because you have been reading the wrong star sign your entire life and you should have married your Prince(ess) Charming, instead of the warty dwarf called Grumpy that your astrologer told you to.

Naturally, you will want to commence legal proceedings and the address to send the writ to is The Moon, because it is all its fault. Due to the Moon's pesky gravitational pull, the Earth has been yanked out if its ancient axis and caused what they call in the scientific community "an almighty cock-up". It is scientists who have dealt this blow to the respected profession of astrology. They have even said that, not only are the star signs themselves not representing the correct dates of birth, but that there should be an extra thirteenth star sign to compensate for the Earth's wobble with which to restore to astrology the respect it so richly deserves.

You will now need to readjust your life accordingly. For instance, if you are Taurean you may henceforth belong to the sign of Aries and should cease being loving, prosperous and patient. You will find it suits you more to be courageous, energetic and pioneering. If only you had known this before, you might have become an arctic explorer or lion tamer and not ended up as an assistant librarian in Godalming. That is where that nagging feeling that there must be more to life than this comes from. Some in the business are outraged at the suggestion that their predictions might not have been accurate all along. The astrologer from the Daily Mail, Jonathan Cainer, said that the scientific community are malevolent and bigoted to suggest such things and said, and I quote: "this is all just nonsense". Which, coincidentally, is the exact same thing I think whenever I read his column

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• blaize
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• buffoon
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[FreakinAyobaMan]

gaaaaa!!! THE HAIR....I <3 the hair!!!!

[DrakeBlaize]

@FreakinAyobaMan thanks hun :P

[vivalavegan22jasper]

the what meet?, and i love your hair <3

[DrakeBlaize]

@vivalavegan22jasper the london furry meet :P

[creeper1ify]

Drake I love you soooooooooooooooo much XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[Luna20111980]

I'm glad I found you, I tried that Christmas cake and ended up on the floor drunk just like you! This is so interesting about the horoscope...you should be in movies/tv not porn/escorting, but I bet that's more fun. ;-)

[andrewwpwhite1978]

Love the new colour hair. Hope you are now fully recovered from that deadly man flu.

[sleazymichael]

i pissed myself - laughing...............your creativity - wit - humour and different hair colours never ceases to amaze.

use of pics brill - ur totally off the wall - off the scale.

my website now has a new feature 'links & banners' with 6 of your blogs - so hope you get some more viewings.

AND big up 2u for Dr Brooke aka Diary of a call GIrl for giving YOU the big up in her blog,

[vampyreofanarchy]

haha i likes the tail what is it a foxy tail?

[vivalavegan22jasper]

@DrakeBlaize  lolz, WOOT fer furries! :D