SkeptiCamp Winnipeg 2011: Polyamory and Mononormative Assumptions

Anlina Sheng is a freelance graphic and web designer, a feminist, and a polyamory activist. For more information about polyamory in Winnipeg, visit http://polywinnipeg.org.

The Winnipeg Skeptics is a local organisation that focuses on the promotion of scientific skepticism. The group hosts monthly Drinking Skeptically events, in addition to regular group outings, awareness campaigns, and an annual SkeptiCamp. For more information:

Blog: http://winnipegskeptics.com
Meetup: http://www.meetup.com/WinnipegSkeptics
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/WinnipegSkeptics

SkeptiCamp is an open conference celebrating science and critical thinking. For more information please visit http://www.skepticamp.org.

Category:

Education

Tags:

• anlina sheng
• winnipeg skeptics
• canada
• winnipeg
• skepticamp
• skepticism
• polyamory
• relationships
• sex
• society
• assumptions
• monogamy
• polygamy

[dookiecheez]

@TheBassLizard

I'm having difficulty finding the 'article' or whatever it is. Additional information might help me find it.

[TheBassLizard]

Dookie, might I suggest, then, a google search for "comparative stability of polyamorous relationships vs monogamous relationships" ? I'd post the link here for you, but YT refuses to allow it. The materials I found were very interesting, although proving neither side of this argument to be more accurate, but being informative, well researched, verified, and scientific, I felt that they'd be more interesting to you than my more emotional arguments. I hope you find material of interest.

[dookiecheez]

@dookiecheez

--therefore they would necessarily tend more towards instability. That would be simple math, and even still I am interested in any peer reviewed material for a definitive answer.

[dookiecheez]

@TheBassLizard

"it was you who said that "there is something to be said for stability" in reference to mono relationships"

That was a general statement about parenting actually.

"I don't agree that they're inherently stable, and there's plenty of empirical evidence to prove that."

Inherently stable...I don't know how any relationship could be inherently stable, and in this case the important point is how it stacks up against poly relationships. I think they necessarily have more variables--

[TheBassLizard]

@dookiecheez Not what I was saying at all.. and it was you who said that "there is something to be said for stability" in reference to mono relationships.

I don't agree that they're inherently stable, and there's plenty of empirical evidence to prove that.

I prefer to think that there might be a better way, and I'm pretty sure truth and honesty are key to that better way working. Maybe it's Poly.. maybe not. I personally believe that Polyamory represents something that MIGHT work. My opinion.

[dookiecheez]

@TheBassLizard

"I merely said that the level of honesty in GREAT Poly relationships MAY lead"

Oooh. So then your argument rests on greatness, not anything intrinsically or demonstrably true about poly relationships.

"I would think that saying the current marriage model is stable, honest, and communicative would be inaccurate."

Who's saying it is?

I was talking about 'demonstrating that this model (poly) is at the very least as sound as mono'.

[TheBassLizard]

@dookiecheez I didn't actually "state" anything as fact.. I merely said that the level of honesty in GREAT Poly relationships MAY lead to them being more stable than the average mono relationship.Current marriage paradigms aren't exactly doing that great in the stability department, and a lack of honesty or communication is very often blamed for that... so I would think that saying the current marriage model is stable, honest, and communicative would be inaccurate.

[dookiecheez]

@TheBassLizard

So you bring up a single statistic, make an assumption about non-married couples, and then state that poly relationships are more honest and have better communication. Riiiight...that's a sound argument.

[TheBassLizard]

@dookiecheez With divorce rates in areas of Canada approaching 50%, and non-married monogamous parent-couples staying together (let's assume) roughly the same amount, I'd say that there may be something to be said for stability, but our society isn't experiencing it, no matter what the relationship model of the parents is. The communication level and honesty level of great Poly relationships may actually lead to them being more stable than Mono relationships!

[seaofserenity]

Having a polyamorous relationship doesn't immediately negate stability nor disrupt parenting. Having had parents who divorced and accepting other figures into my life in that role, I can say that it's the individuals not the family structure that most influenced my sense of love and stability