Notebook: Are You My Mommy?

A recent study says there are no negative effects from adopted children seeking out their birth parents, but only 8 states allow it. Katie Couric says it might be time for all states to open records.

Category:

News & Politics

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• Katie
• Couric
• Notebook
• Adoption
• Birth
• parent
• Adopted
• records
• Children
• CBS
• News

[iduntfeelsogood]

Hell yes. This need to be more widely distributed. It needs to reach more APs. Open APs. They need to understand that when their achildren want to find their nfamilies, they shouldn't stand in the way. Nobody should stand in the way. No one can ever understand how specific adoptees feel about their situations. No one but those adoptees themselves. So the states need to stop making decisions for people whose whole lives have already been decided for them.

--18 y/o ADULT adoptee.

[firedancer9205]

you must be looking into some exceedingly specific studies to only come up with rodents. or else you have a rodent fetish. There have been studies over the last 50 years on this issue. ON HUMANS. Why are you so strongly in denial? What does it benefit you to stay in denial? Adoptees are being discriminated against and you only help the cause with your blind statement positions.

[TheTravelfool]

I am looking for my birthparents. I was born 12/23/1984 in Rochester, NY at RGH weighing 7lbs. I was given the name Mary Theresa. My birthmother gave me a letter saying I had my maternal grandma's blue eyes (sorry they changed to brown mom), my dad's cleft, and her small ears. My bio parents were 21. My dad was in college. My mom was in college studying special ed. He was Italian and my mom was Irish, German, and French (Americans). She is 5ft 5. He is 5ft 9. She's Catholic. Please contact me!!

[betsyakh]

I was adopted and I have been looking for a very long time with no luck in finding my biological mother and half sister. My adoptive parents tried very hard to get as much information as they could. It was very little information but because they did this responsible and carrying thing not only for themselves but for me it made me love them and respect them even more. Because of them they made me who I am today, extraordinary when ever I think of them.

[momof80s]

@imasmartcookie76 You are a smart cookie. I cannot believe how insensitive some people are to the feelings of others. I have not met the adopted person who is absent that painful longing to know who their birth mom & parents are. It is a void that burns deep within us. Birth mom's & parents are the ultimate in importance to those of us who have been torn from them by adoption.

[momof80s]

Hey. I checked the search angel's but currently, they are only servicing UK, Canada and Guam. I am born & raised in NYC/long Island. My birthday is indeed XMAS day and the name listed on my original birth certificate was "Boland." I hired Omnitrace last January and do hope with all my might that they are sincere. It is hard to know who to trust. I appreciate any wisdom you may lend me from your experience.

[momof80s]

@msusiecu I am so happy that people are replying to me. I hired PI to search for my birth parents. I know mom's maiden name or at least the one she put on my BC. Is there anything more that an original BC will reveal than what I already know? (Last name I had when born) I am waiting for NYS to give non-identifying info. Said she was 18 at time of my birth (XMAS day). That's all I know. Can I trust PI's to search? I am concerned PI's are expensive & may not deliver. Any help w/be so appreciated.

[momof80s]

@SkiealarMae24 Wow. I can empathize w/you although from where I sit, I would rather risk an emotion in trade-off for emotionally longing to know who my birth parents are--Not that I want sadness or some other disappointment, but I want to know so strongly, now more than ever since I am actively searching, I am more anxious than before. I will be empty if I don't find them. Do you have any tips about locating birth parents?

[SkiealarMae24]

@momof80s-- its not that i was disappointed, i was grateful! because i knew that if i were with my birth mom that i would not have the opportunities i do now. I DID have that long to know... and you are VERY right, it is VERY sad and painful and lonely!!!! I was sad for my mom, sad that she has the life that she has, that she cant get better, that she has lost ALL hope in everything so she intentionally is throwing her life away!! there is a sadness that replaces that longing.... just a new hurt

[msusiecu]

@ momof80s I just got your reply, I pray u have found some new info by this writing. Let me know what u know, maybe I can give u a few ideas.

[momof80s]

@msusiecu I am an adoptee and I pray my mom and dad feel as you do. I strongly feel that they are both married to other people and that the spouses do not want to think about their relationship that produced me. It is a lonely and hurtful longing to search for them, even before I actively began searching for them, my heart searched.

[momof80s]

@SkiealarMae24 I regret that you were disappointed upon discovering a birth parent because I know regardless of who my parents are, there is nothing that will stop the deep and hurtful longing to know who they are other than finding them. I know in my heart that I will never, ever be disappointed and that I will never, ever feel that it would have been better not to know. Never. You are very fortunate that you don't have to long to know as I do because it is a very sad & very lonely to long.