Rep. Markey in E&C Hearing asks GOP if they plan to legislate against Gravity, Relativity

Remarks of Rep. Edward J. Markey (D-Mass.)
Subcommittee on Energy and Power
3/10/11

Mr. Chairman, I rise in opposition to a bill that overturns the scientific finding that pollution is harming our people and our planet.

However, I won't physically rise, because I'm worried that Republicans will overturn the law of gravity, sending us floating about the room.

I won't call for the sunlight of additional hearings, for fear that Republicans might excommunicate the finding that the Earth revolves around the sun.

Instead, I'll embody Newton's third law of motion and be an equal and opposing force against this attack on science and on laws that will reduce America's importation of foreign oil.

This bill will live in the House while simultaneously being dead in the Senate. It will be a legislative Schrodinger's cat killed by the quantum mechanics of the legislative process!

Arbitrary rejection of scientific fact will not cause us to rise from our seats today. But with this bill, pollution levels will rise. Oil imports will rise. Temperatures will rise.

And with that, I yield back the balance of my time. That is, unless a rejection of Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity is somewhere in the chair's amendment pile.

• Category

  News & Politics

[Jeff S]

If you want to see one of the effects of CO2, follow these steps:

1. Lock your ass up in a small air-tight box

2. Breath for an hour

3. Die

Congratulations, you have now figured out the poisonous effects of CO2.

[wfmkk]

@varek3d

No, no ... we're just going to tax STUPIDITY.

Congratulations; you're in the top tax bracket.

[Sky Nelson]

This is awesome.

[Aggie0680]

Wow he is so intelligent! I'm just a dumb republican I don't even know what he's talking about. How cute. Hey jackass, ever heard of the ice age? The earth climate changed then too wouldn't you say? I guess those cave men made too many fires

[rB777ftw]

This guy is running for Kerry's Senate seat. I would vote for him.

[Stewiegriffinist]

Republicans suck.

[ohkki123]

I cannot believe Americans debate in congress about scientific evidence accepted by 98.5% of climate scientists. I doubt a single one of your Republican politicians holds a science diploma; on the other hand, did they even go to school?

However it is also an undeniable fact that multi-billion dollar Oil and Coal companies were caught funding groups that deny global warming with millions, the same group that organized rallies for the Tea party and countless other republican political meetings.

[trwent]

Want to run for President as a Republican? Here's what you need to do:

(1) reject evolution as a mere conjecture, and even better claim that the earth and all life on it were created in 6 literal days about 10,000 years ago; (2) deny global warming is taking place; (3) claim that homosexuality is a choice, and that homosexuals are actively recruiting kids in our public schools into the "lifestyle"; (4) do everything you can to deny women access to birth control, thereby assuring more abortions.

[buckley969]

What a gasbag.

[Jeb Roberts]

fuck you...

[joshuaoha]

What a god damned smart ass........ I like him!

[NewWorldOrderRED]

Gravity does exist unless Obama believes in it in which case my answer is no it doesn't exist and it should be outlawed in our schools.