i just passed out for about two hours it might be the heat i started to dream i was with your mum dont know where i went up to her she was smileing and i hugged her but then i remembered pushed her away an came round :(
i kept saying whle your mums ill ill catch the bus everyday to beaumont leys to see you both even if its just for half hour or an hour or to take you swiming she kept saying she dont like beaumont leays sopping center shell come over to me it was obviously cus if anyone saw us together it would fuck it all up for her
i did feel like sending this cunt a message when i found out but that would be like saying well done 1-0 to you and id look even more fucking mental bye the time i maybe able to see you will have forgotten me so its best not to cause any problems let you get on with whatever no matter how much you love someone you should stand up for yourself i didnt and maybe i lost her respect i should of forced her to come to my friends parties and stuff when i was a guest but the less trouble i made for her between her and her mum i thought less impact on you incase you saw them argue
i never said when u were in tenirife its always strange i have never heard you in the background or she put you on the phone maybe twice i heard you
SUISIDE
i have felt low before where iv wanted to die but since i made this clip i was real low found myself on the kitchen floor running on auto pilot looking at the cleaning products and ant powder
my phone rang and i answerd it out of instinct my mate ben started talking to me and my mind got taken to another place later that day i was back there in that state again and a virtual friend came online started talking to me all night and she kept me busy and i fell sleep it wasnt till the next day i realised what had almost happend and realised that it is just like makeing a sandwitch you do it without thinking it poison would never of been an option if i was thinking about it in a million years
i was thinking different things all together
what really hurt i think the most is the realization it was her keeping me on the outside of her life always maintaining a distance from her real life but the new bloke was there in front of everybody on show and i was always kept out of view like she was ashamed of me or had something to hide
4 weeks have now past and im only now starting to think about things and its like mental toucher all the things in my head the sadness is awfull
i don't feel ill anymore perhaps it was the feeling of her neglect towards me that was making me feel bad?? who knows
im going to stay on my own now for as far as i can see into the future there aint no one in this whole world for me she wasn't even good enough
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5:09
In Time Robbi Robbby mgolin226,508 views
Please dont comit sucide
AvatarFraser 3 years ago