28-05- Say NO to FOOT JOBS

I've been scarred a few times.



Sitting in the cinema, enjoying a flick,
Getting pretty thirsty, so need to have a drink
Felt a tap on my shoulder, thought 'what's the matter?'
I looked down at my arm; it was a dirty woman's trotter.
---
One time in my car, I was cruising on the highway
A car drove up in the lane beside me,
A dude was driving, and his girl was shotgun
I look over at her, and there I spot them.

Ladies feet freak me out.

Her sweaty old foot, up on the dash
I had to pull over or I'd probably crash.
It's not just girls, it's feet in general
But girls with hairy toes, well they're just feral

Yeah feet freak me out.

One summer day, swimming in the river
I got to the bank and I saw something slither
I froze......
It was a snake!

And it freaked me out

How do they move? I don't understand
No arms or legs, but they've got poison glands
If it comes at me, I'll probably die.
Maybe if I splash it with water it'll say goodbye.

Snakes freak me out.

But also... I don't these
You know them, you call them bees
But I call them.
F**KING BEES!

Bees freak me out.

Something about them, they attack without warn
One is bad enough but imagine a swarm
At least they die once they sting you
Kamikaze insects, are on my menu of...

Things that freak me out.
---

At the bus stop just the other day.
The faint smell of urine wafted my way
I checked myself and it wasn't my pee
Homeless guy sleeping right next to me.
He looked dead!

And it freaked me out.
---

One time in the shower, not ready for a scare
I looked down and found a grey pubic hair

And it freaked me out.

But what's even worse,
it wasn't my own.
It was the homeless guy's ...he'd followed me home!

And it freaked me out.

Yeah things freak me out,
Everyday I'm paranoid
And when I leave the house,
these are things that I avoid.
You say that I'm wuss,
I just call it vigilance.
It's not my fault that
you find foot jobs so pleasant.

Cos they freak me out
(They freak me out, yeah they freak me out)
Foot jobs freak me out.
(How does a foot rubbin on your junk?)
It just freaks me out.

SAY NO TO FEET!

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• cailr
• what
• freaks
• you
• out
• funny
• song
• jizz
• in
• my
• pants
• lonely
• island
• incredibad
• parody

[5awesomeaussies]

First - Pete!

[Mifftup]

First

[5awesomeaussies]

fail..

[haisuphelga]

lol i ts so cute

[CailR]

Thanks Megan! Glad you did! :)

[filthyxcute]

lollllllllllll cail ur a cracker. love the facials in this one....jemimaaa freakss me outttttttt! not really... :-D i love her.

[jewelchic]

Funny-loved it xxxxxx

[dctcool]

"He looked Dead"

LOL

Call Choppa he'll put a beat to this

[CailR]

I agree, I'm sure there is some huge shopping mall conspiracy to cover up the millions of people who die each year on escalators. It's like a staircase made of razor blades.

[CailR]

WRONG KATIE, A snake's body is like one giant foot.

Instead of disgusting toes, they've got poisonous fangs.

[CailR]

In the music video for this song, I envisage me dancing exactly the same, only I've got snakes draped over my body and a swarm of bees around me.