TEDxSanAntonio - Alicia Arenas - Recognizing Glass Children

Speaker: Alicia Arenas

Title of talk: Recognizing Glass Children — What It Means to Be a Sibling of a Child with Special Needs

About this talk: Having lost one brother to the world of autism and another to a terminal illness, Alicia Arenas never knew a normal childhood. Expected to always put on a brave face, Arenas played the role of good girl on the outside. One the inside, however, she was dying. In this heart-wrenching talk, Arenas tells parents of children with special needs — and their surrounding community — to stop looking through the siblings of children with special needs.

About Alicia Arenas: Arenas is an entrepreneur and small business consultant in her company Sanera, The People Development Company — where she runs the Sanera Camp, a business boot camp. For more about Arenas: HYPERLINK "http://www.sanerapdc.com/about/meet-alicia/" www.SaneraPDC.com/about/meet-alicia/

About TEDx, x = independently organized event
In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

Video Opener by Rod Guajardo foursandyfeet.com. Music: MUSICXXX Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons "Attribution 3.0.

Category:

Nonprofits & Activism

Tags:

• TEDxSanAntonio
• Alicia
• Arenas
• Recognizing
• Glass
• Children
• What
• It
• Means
• to
• Be
• Sibling
• of
• Child
• with
• Special
• Needs

[TheAvadiamond]

Alicia, you are magnificent. This is an issue I knew nothing about, and you were able to impact my head and my heart in this brief amount of time. Your story is powerful, and one that will help many, many people. thank you for sharing it.

[cooksr79]

I am also an adult glass child, and I had the chance to watch Alicia deliver this talk live at TedX San Antonio. Alicia's talk has given me a fresh perspective on many things I went through as a child that I carry around like a martyr bellhop hauling some serious emotional baggage. If you had shown this to me 10 years ago, I didn't have the ability to see it as clearly. Now I'm pursuing counseling and learning how to stand on my own and let emotions out instead of protecting people from them.

[wallofwords]

@Raelara1 I want to encourage you to think a little differently for a moment. There is space enough for there to be compassion for all sides of this issue. Autism doesn't affect just one person. It affects the entire family. "Pity Me" can go too far (on all sides), but that's not in Alicia's message at all. In fact, she went out of her way to make it not be about her, but about how community can reach out and make a difference. And from personal experience - such involvement can be a lifeline.

[Lysaken27]

As the Mother of three (two of which are glass children) I am happy to see you speak on this subject. Any Baby Can of San Antonio TX also provides a WONDERFUL WONDERFUL sibling support group that we have taken advantage of for years. It is free and meets once a month. I encourage any family with a special needs child to please please seek out the medicaid waiver programs. Our lives have changes dramatically since we came up on the waiting list and now have attendants assisting with care.

[Raelara1]

@nshaalla I would like to know that as well. Too often I see "glass children", my own siblings included, thinking of how difficult childhood was for THEM because of a special needs sibling. I can honestly say that none of the great number I have met have ever said anything about where that sibling is now, never shown any concern for that sibling's happiness. My siblings aren't quite that bad, but the narrowmindedness, the "I suffered SO much because of ___" goes WAY too far.

[Raelara1]

I have never hated myself more than when I was watching this video. I am the embodiment of the OTHER side of the coin. I am autistic. And I have spent most of my adulthood trying to come to terms with MY miserable childhood. The last thing I needed to hear ... again ... was that my very existence made my siblings lives miserable too. Alicia's message is heartening for glass children. It is a spear through the heart for those of us on the "other side". I wish I'd skipped watching this.

[nshaalla]

Hi Alicia, thanks for sharing your eloquent & poignant story. As you know, I work for a special needs org. Several co-workers have siblings with significant needs. We've been planning for them to share their stories to increase staff understanding of the sibling experience, not just as children but ongoing in adulthood. As I listen to your story, I wonder how Mario is doing now. Where does he live & work? Is he happy? Are you and your family at peace? Hoping all is well, Krista

[TheKarlaPorter]

Alicia - A gentle wind that changes its trajectory of a bullet 15" so clearly can save a life.. May your story affect many, many lives... ~Karla

[KathyCustren]

Standing Ovation!! Alicia, this is such an awesome video and great message! I am sharing it and asking that this awareness be spread far and wide. It needs to be experienced, and we need to BE that one-mile-per-hour wind for sure. Get out the tissues now, but get ready to make change happen. Blessings!

[shellc76051]

Thank you for sharing your story...very thought-provoking...