How to Recover From Infidelity or An Affair

http://www.divorcebusting.com/blog/how-to-recover-from-infidelity-or-an-affair/

The topic for day is recovering from infidelity or affairs.

Hi I'm Michele Weiner-Davis, founder of http://DivorceBusting.com.

The most common time when couples come to seek my help is when they've been working on this issue for a while after the discovery and they get stuck because the person who's had the affair is so ready to be done talking about it, rehashing the details, going on and on and on. The other person who is still hurting, still trying to get passed that devastation, really needs information, really needs to discuss their feelings. One person thinks, how can we heal if we keep talking about it. The other person thinks if you aren't willing to talk about it, you can't understand how much pain I'm in.

Well, here's the news. You're both right!

And because you're both right, here's what you need to do. You need to set aside some predesignated time where you know you will have the opportunity to discuss whatever comes up about the affair: answering questions, sharing information.

But conversely, you will set aside time where it's problem free zone. Where you don't talk about the affair, you plan dinners together, you go out and do something fun, so that you can rebuild that foundation.

All the while knowing if the other person still needs to talk on Tuesdays and Thursday evenings you'll be able to do that.

So if you follow that formula: time to talk vs. time not to talk, you'll make it through to the other side. Try that.

Category:

Howto & Style

Tags:

• infidelity
• affairs
• cheating
• marriage advice
• healing
• love
• relationships
• michele weiner-davis
• divorce

[cyberprof]

Great advice!