Narcissistic Personality Disorder | Help for partners

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• narcissism
• emotional abuse
• relationship advice

[Keekasqueek]

Hi guys, I have been to your site and am reading. I have a friend who is often giving me the silent treatment by blocking me on fb and texts. I try to reason with him and apologize but it just makes him more angry/abusive. Says he doesnt want me in his life anymore. After a while he will come back saying he is giving me "another chance". But each time gets worse. We dated 5 years in hs and he was abusive. What do you both suggest during silent treatment? thank you so much!

[kimandSteveCooper]

@Keekasqueek - If you don't have much invested in this relationship I would be asking yourself why you are so interested in a person who is abusive? I had 3 kids with Steve and so there were good reasons for me to see it through with him. One way or another you finding yourself some goals to work on now and getting on with your own life will make you much more attractive.

[Keekasqueek]

@kimandSteveCooper Thank you for your response. It is because we grew up together and have known eachother a long time. We were firsts and i care about him very much. He went thru a lot growing up. his mom was only 15 when she got pregnant and the father abandoned him. He acts strong but it is a front and i know he hurts and is vulnerable to rejection.

So i should ignore the silent treatments? For how long? Thank you again.

[kimandSteveCooper]

@Keekasqueek - Set some goals for yourself and let him know you are busy working on those but you are around if he decides he wants to talk to you again ... Like you could say "I have started learning the piano and am putting a lot of time into lessons and practice - but I am around most afternoons if you decide you want to talk to me ..."

[BorderlineMatt]

Hi guys, great videos. I was just wondering, is Steve a somatic narcissist or the cerebral narcissist?

[kimandSteveCooper]

@BorderlineMatt - A bit of both I think - but that was never professionally assessed

Kim Cooper

[DabneyFountain]

@DabneyFountain Sorry Keek...I posted my message to the wrong party. It was meant for kimand...

[DabneyFountain]

@Keekasqueek Stop making excuses for this guy.  Many of us have come from tragic childhoods. It does not explain or excuse bad behavior within any relationship. Take a minute and read "He's Just Not In To You." and go for a relationship that doesn't hurt.

[zakinga]

Narcissism is interesting and I think most of people will act narcissistic at one point or the other. I was the partner codependent etc but some days I find myself acting in narcissistic ways even though I m not proud of it at least I know I m not perfect either and have lots to work on ! Sometimes codependents think they are " the better" one "the victim" etc but more often then not they just don't want to see their part :)

[riskiv]

I was engaged six months ago to a woman I love beyond anything I ever experienced before. She would lose her temper & I thought it was due to her bad marriage of 23 yrs. & would stop once she saw that i was totally dedicated to her. But the engagement set off a period of serious abuse & I was going to leave her until I found this site. Kim your work is so important -I know miracles can happen as I got sober through AA in 1988. I did not realize my Co-D was bad again. Keep up the great work.