Anorexia Update- 8/7/09- Lost the Battle, But I WILL Win this War.

Yesterday i fell way off of the recovery path into destruction. But somehow, I was strong enough to pull myself back up and reach out for help. I know what my triggers and stressors are, and that's very important to know that. I followed a lot of my coping skills to get through the next day.... I cleaned... A lot. =p
www.myspace.com/ohshiz_beaa (my email is bonnie1008@ameritech.net idk why it keeps asking for it for some people.)
www.facebook.com/bpacyga
www.twitter.com/OSnapski
www.youtube.com/werfreedomfighters
MSN: XXGreenEyedGirl@hotmail.com
AIM: FuzZmuFFin07

Category:

People & Blogs

Tags:

• OSnapski
• Anorexia
• Bulimia
• Ana
• Mia
• Eating
• Disorder
• ED
• recovery
• relapse
• thin
• skinny
• thinsperation
• purge
• weight
• scale
• mary
• kate
• olsen
• nicole
• richie
• depression

[sexlessparents]

you eat 500 calories for breakfast ?

i eat less then 500 calories a day

since late may

i had no problems, but now i can't go running anymore. i get chest pains, my heart feels bad or something. i have been passing out too.

i don't think i have an ED yet. i was supposed to go visit family in another state, but i won't go now because i don't have control of what i eat there. when i am running, sometimes i feel like i am going to die, i don't want to die, but i don't want to stop yet

[OSnapski]

yeah its aprt of my meal plan.

b-500

l-550

d;1100

when i was sick, i was only eating 60 calories a day.

[TTGGrave]

Great attitude. You're SO strong and inspiring. Good luck to you. :-)

[OSnapski]

thank you so much <3

[elisarecovery]

I love you so so so so so much Bea.

You're so strong and special and lovely...I'm proud of you for reaching out to us...to the Meadster...whoever.

You can get back on track.

Love you,

elisa

[OSnapski]

lmfaooo hell yeah the Meadster. lol

thank you babe <3 you can always come to me for help to.

[1994Leah1994]

dont give up tryingggg.

x

[penguins20rock]

Babe, the only person you should be worried about letting down is yourself. You shouldn't be recovering for us. But for yourself. I support you and wish you luck. And, even though I have no clue who u r. I feel closer to you knowing we share the same problem (even tho I'm only 13) sometimes you just wanna scream. But you know what? I think your beautiful and brave. And I'm sure many others do too. Best of luck babe ;)

~~~~ Becca

[thesophieduncan]

inspirational

[perfecti0n92]

Bea, I can see your distress in this video and it breaks my heart but at the same time I find it comforting so thank you.

[shinznay]

hello:) your very brave for talking about your anorexia.. i have anorexia.. well i do but its better now.. i have been binging for a month now.. i couldont stop because i panicked about going into hospital.. so ie at and eat.. annd i kep eating to block the though of gain weight.. but i now no im going on a diet tomorow and i cant let ana control me!

[MrChimpChimp]

Next cosmetic surgeries and Botox!!! I bet you need support and upload youtube videos for that one as well. Man, it's hard to live a life as a butt ugly hoe isn't it?

[MrChimpChimp]

OMG, you are so brave. Despite the fact that there are contemporary soldiers fighting to save the land you live in, your "war" against anorexia is the embodiment of prowess.

I mean think about it. You can have all the clothes, food, entertainment, education and light you could possibly ask for, cause your daddy and mama are out busting their asses working,

and you need to engage in combat to prevent yourself from NOT EATING. You are an inspiration... To us all!!!

[anarunnerx]

you look great Bea, keep strong with this annoying eating disorder , i am suffering too I hateeee it. I added you on Msn so hopefully we can talk or something

-Nikki

[dauntlessdreams]

keep having those motivations like school and friends and everyything to keep you going. relapses DO suck. i can see the sadness in your eyes, but you know you are worth so much more than it. theres always those two sides of your mind bickering to each other; but you CAN win, u know what's right in your heart <333

love ya bea

xoxoxo

molly

[dauntlessdreams]

im so sorry bea. things will definitely get better; they have before, so why not again. its normal to have these scares during recovery. things will get rocky from time to time. and you're very welcome, i'm rly glad u came to me for help. u know u can call or text me anytime.

[MeaAnathema]

We all relapse from time to time, what is important is how we handle it, and I think you are doing great. You could have stayed down but you didnt, and that is so important.