No More Nails - The Glucifixion

Jesus gets glued up! Right, owing to the (somewhat dubious) threat of legal action recently by (someone claiming to be) a lawyer for the company who manufacture No More Nails, I would like to point out that this is not a real commercial. Apparently, some of you think this was made and broadcast by No More Nails as a real bona fide TV commercial. It isn't. It's a joke. But thanks for the compliment anyway.

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• nails
• jesus
• glucifixion
• crucified
• miracle
• bible
• crucifixion
• crucify

[TheProphetMo]

Jesus returned the other day and appeared on a beach in Australia.

A local christian was very excited and asked him to do the 'walking on the water' trick again to prove he was the son of god.

So Jesus took a few steps into the ocean and sank like a rock.

The christian was confused by this and said:

"I though you could walk on water, what's the problem"?

And Jesus replied:

"Well, the last time I did it, I didn't have these fucking holes in my feet"!

[daisatronik]

All Abrahamic religions are just mistranslated/corrupted versions of older "Pagan" religions. Pretty clear if you look into it.

[goformickey]

I feel like this is offensive to someone somewhere.

[TheCobalt100]

When I was 10, I figured there was no Santa. It took me another 8 years to figure that there was no Jesus either. It was like having a 50,000 dollar bank loan forgiven. Now I couldn't just throw my sins on the scape-goat. After that, I was no longer a sinner, but a kind, thoughtful person.

[Lunabeam1]

HAHA!! Mocking Christianity

[TheEarl666]

Too funny

[boochris100]

JACK ASS O:<

[vahhho]

@jahoodunrama I recommend you reading it more closely while you are an adulthood and than try to evaluate it more precisely because I know when I was in my 8-16 years old I barely even paid closed attention to details that were written in it and so on, and another factor about reading Bible is that ones you read for example new testament ones, you will never read it the same next time. Being skeptical may be both good and bad which should be looked according to situations of course.

[jahoodunrama]

@vahhho i read most of it as a teenager but havent since i reached adulthood. im always open to information but i try to not forget to be sceptical as well.

[jahoodunrama]

@vahhho what is truth to me? how can truth ever be anything but one thing?

man is basically good in that, left to our own devices we are altruistic in nature but culture and environment can breed some very malicious people. and the other is referring to the einstein (iirc) quote about stupidity.

again, google is your friend; a search for "contradictions in the bible" should yield enough results. i cant remember any off the top of my head other than the father of Joseph.

[vahhho]

@jahoodunrama I've just read the article on how stuff works, now started reading about pagan, but my question to you is, have you ever read at least new testament yourself from beginning to end with a typical open to information mind?

[vahhho]

@jahoodunrama well if you are going to find fault in my words all the time than I didn't write "running in circles" but wrote "go around circles". Anyways, what do you mean by you believe that man is basically good and basically stupid? What is truth for you? I also believe that you believe that I don't believe everything that Bible says because it is not easy to understand, and many places there are hard to interpret. Read 2 Peter 3:16 if you don't mind. Give me an example of contradiction.