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CrossWired 11.11.11

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Uploaded by on Dec 12, 2007

Crosswired 11.11.11

So... how to survive in Corporate America. Here's what I learned to help you.

As soon as you get a job, immediately start looking for another.

Never give your opinion and always agree with the person in charge.

Think about and edit what you say, BEFORE you say it.

Always ask a question that you already know the answer to.

Always show up late for every meeting and
say "Sorry." Makes you stand out.

Wait for the 3rd memo before doing any actual work.

Just because you use a computer, doesn't mean you become one.

Never show emotion. Good news or a crisis is the same reaction.

Be pleasant but not funny.

Never do your job alone. Teamwork, that way everyone gets blamed.

Do not trust, confide or socialize with anyone at work, period.

NEVER drink alcohol at company functions. That's when they ask your opinion on how the company is doing. Lost more associates that way.

Always be busy whether you are or not.

Treat everyone equally and fairly.

Never, ever gossip about anything.

Never show weakness that you need this job, then they gotcha.

Do not fill out a personality test...now they know what buttons to push to get rid of you.

Pretend to care about everything the company recommends regardless of how stupid it really is.

Have access to a lawyer.

Read and understand all company documents, especially the ones you sign.

Eat healthy, excercise and sleep as much as possible.

Dress appropriately and look clean.

Always have a Plan B and Plan C waiting in the wings.

CYA

Try to accomplish something every once in awhile, but don't over do it: then they expect it.

Keep losing or breaking your company cellphone or blackberry as much as possible.

Don't give out your personal cell phone number to the company or anyone at work.

Set up Auto respond to all your e-mails. If it's really necessary they'll call you.

Most importantly, the years go by quick, so enjoy yourself.

Turbo

All materials licensed and protected. 2007

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Uploader Comments (SteveTurboThompson)

  • it was very good thanks...i was flying out of body

  • Excellent! I get this weightless, floating sensation and my mind drifts off...

    Which is why I produced it...to purge tension and relax. Turbo

  • do i need to go get my bong to figure this video out?

  • Hey Dude: Whatever works. A mild sedative and a few beers works for me. Of course, I haven't figured it out yet and I produced it. Turbo

  • Very moving. Thanks so much!

  • Man, your videos are awesome! Thanks for opening the door. Turbo

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  • The description is wonderful it is so Real i recomend future people to read it it is very worth while, life and career helping. thank you for sharing your wisdom.

  • ? what the hell is this

  • haha, ill be sure to pull this video up the next time im at a party

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