Get Your Butt Out Of My Food!

You're enjoying a meal at a favorite restaurant. The diners at the next table get up to leave, and one of them has to squeeze by your table. The last thing you want is his ass in your food. But is the alternative any better?

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Category:

People & Blogs

Tags:

• mo
• rocca
• diner
• etiquette

[kamibeavis]

Push your table to the side and walk normal.

But if you've been sitting adjacent Jeffery Steingarten, then its ass with gas.

If Padma, then rock out with your c@ck out.

Between Jeffery Steingarten & Padma? Perfect! ....depending on wind drafts.

[SnivenMcLovin]

Crotch...but I always whip it out and flop it on their plates as I slide across. Sometimes I knock everything off the entire table :D

[Naurunorihc]

try going out the other side

[RozenklanZ]

crotch

[beatriz0607]

ass

[linkinparkdude15]

Take the knife, slit both their throats, go fucking ape shit and throw the table at a waiter or waitress, then leave calmly. Pro: No drama, no eye contact, no squeezing out

Con: Are none, go do it people NAOW

[goochieguy]

my ass andd crotch are very savory

whip it out and let 'em have it.

[kamibeavis]

Push your table to the side and walk normal.

But if you've been sitting adjacent Jeffery Steingarten, then its ass with gas.

If Padma, then rock out with your c@ck out.

Between & Padma? Perfect! ....depending on wind drafts.

[KBURNN]

ass

[jjlinert]

Either way is okay if you're a midget or petite. Then again, if you are a busty, short person, the breast swiping across plates of food might not be too appealing to you or the others. Flat, short people have it the easiest in this situation. Giants with a gland problem also will have no problem here.

For the average person, get some stilts to add height OR bend your knees and make yourself a shorty. You'll be able to get out with dignity and get a bit of exercise at the same time .

[Equestrianjumper567]

ass