Marriage vs. "Gay Marriage"

A four-point argument asserting the difference between marriage as a functional institution vs. the claims of gay marriage advocates.

THE ARGUMENT: Marriage currently serves four functions that are not compatible with "gay marriage".

1. PROTECTION FROM POVERTY
Defining "family" as any social unit bound by bonds of affection (i.e. expressly rejecting the idea that family is defined by kinship) will have a direct impact on the flow of resources from older generations to younger ones, because the bonds of affection are weak and unstable in comparison with the stronger bonds of kinship.

2. PROTECTING WOMEN AGAINST EXPLOITATION
3. PROTECTING MEN AGAINST MANIPULATION
Gay marriage rather embraces that exploiting and manipulating your child's mommy or daddy is a "right", no?
But what is the impact on the family? On the children?
(Do we know? Can we make reasonably intelligent guesses?)

4. CREATING STABLE SOCIAL STRUCTURES
Strong, stable families ideally consist of three types of bonds: kinship, legal, and emotional.
Treating any one of these three bonds as "optional" will have an impact.

We know what happens in chemistry when you replace strong bonds with weak ones.
Why would we want to replace the enduring bonds of kinship with an ever-fluctuating "right to choose" who will or will not be recognized as kin?

Category:

Nonprofits & Activism

Tags:

• traditional
• marriage
• family
• values
• gay
• homosexual
• rights

[Clemburke1111]

I did watch it,,my point is homosexuals getting married or not is not going to change the statistics of marriage and the dead beat daddy syndrome in America,,Marriage has a 48% rate of sucess,,that is an F, where ever I went to school. Gays are not going to turn straight and marry women if gay marriage never happens, your responibility is to infrom the straight community on healthy marriage'es and child rearing.

[vicorii]

@Clemburke1111 Well, I've made my argument.

If nothing I've said makes you even think about the issue, then I guess that is that.

Best of luck to you.

[Clemburke1111]

Can you tell e how gay marriage will take these things away ? I am married to my Partner in Boston MA with two children How are you affecdted?

[vicorii]

@Clemburke1111 Try watching the video, where I answer this very question.

[RCSVirginia]

@grahamburgers

You have made all the points that I would have made, and you have done a great job in making them. I hope everyone will scroll and read your comments, one after the other.

Well done!

[thatkid82093]

@thatkid82093 I question how this would be different than if a straight couple adopted and then separated also, If you are denying a gay couple the right to marry doesn't that remove the all so important legal aspect of the family with two parents of the same sex?

[thatkid82093]

I feel many of your arguments, especially in the first two segments argue against adoption in general. You refer to a child adopted by a gay couple as if it would be treated as an extra appendage of sorts (without kinship) and not assimilated into the family, and question where this child would stand in the end of a gay marriage.

[grahamburgers]

Basically, your argument rests on the ONE fallacy that anything about marriage laws will be changed. It won't. Gay couples will simply be treated PRECISELY the same as straight couples. None of this will come to pass by changing the wording of marriage laws so as to include same-sex couples.

However, I applaud your effort to use official sounding language to make your paranoia sound plausible. It might've worked if people didn't know how to read.

[grahamburgers]

Society already has the act of surrogate mothers, who bear children for infertile couples. In other words, all that would happen is the women willing to do this would potentially have more customers -- which, as to your previous point -- would encourage the flow of resources, wouldn't it? Gay men are not going to procreate with a woman, force her to pop out a baby and then ignore her. Because, y'know, the whole idea of gay marriage is NOT to have gay men sticking it to women.

[grahamburgers]

Furthermore, a gay relationship is not a "friendship" and same-sex marriage is not an attempt by two best friends to become "sisters" or "brothers" -- a gay relationship is between two consenting adults who are in love, much like a heterosexual relationship prior to marriage is between two consenting adults who are in love, so your entire point of "bonds of affection" and "bonds of kinship" is completely moot. A marriage transforms bonds of affection to bonds of kinship. That's the point of it.

[grahamburgers]

I was going to address your other arguments but as I continued watching, I realized you have no idea what gay marriage advocates are advocating, and therefore opening a dialogue with you is not possible. Gay marriage advocates are not even addressing the topic of children or their biological parentage -- that's gay adoption, and they are only advocating that gay people be allowed to adopt just the same as heterosexual people. The kinship/affection bonds would be the same.

[grahamburgers]

Your 1st argument, in SUPER flawed.

1) You are either saying the decision to make a baby is the strong kinship bond, or the vow of marriage is. If it is the former, you must be assuming that single parents don't exist, parents with children never divorce, and there are no deadbeat parents. That's wrong. If it is the latter, the only way to ensure a strong bond between two gay people, and allow gay people to help resources flow, is to allow homosexual marriage, or the flow of resources stops.

[rugbydazz]

I am A British gay man and I am in a civil partnership which gives me and my partner the rights as hetrosexual couples, It also means that we have to go through divorce the same way as a hetrosexual couple, the point i'm making when I had relationships in the past it was easy to throw in the towel when things went wrong 5 years later we are still together we recognise that we made a committment in public and the consequnces of throwing the towel in Civil partnership has been a good thing for me.

[SeanMichael12288]

You obviously have no idea what marriage is or why it came about. A man and woman do not make kinship ties to have children. Take an anthropology course or two and you'll find out why that is.