Shopping (original song)

This is the roughest performance of this song you will ever see, owing to the fact that this is the first time I've actually sung it... I wrote it out, printed the lyrics and thought I'd record it all fresh-off-the-press.


LYRICS;
Everybody's awesome, everything's amazing
Every experience is awesome and amazing
Learn these little words and forget all other phrasing
'cause everything is awesome and everyone's amazing.

Literature is dying, yet nobody's crying
'cause everybody's got their sunglasses on
in the supermarket, scavenging like vulture's 'round a carcass
With their skinny-leg jeans and skate shoes on
Everybody's buying, everybody's buying
Walking plastic bags of happiness straight out the door
Everybody's smiling, everybody's smiling
Inside their hearts, greed shrieks for more.

Attention shoppers!
Mind-melting bargains on love in aisle 27!
Get your philosophical-satisfaction-in-a-can now, now, now!
Eternal salvation for low, low prices, ask at the counter for details!
Christmas is just around the corner, be a smart shopper and buy your Easter eggs now!
Be afraid of terrorist attacks, treat your husband to a brand new fall-out shelter today!

Shopping shopping shopping shopping
shopping shopping shopping
Is there a greater thrill in life?
Than shopping shopping shopping shopping
Glorious shopping!
Have you ever had such fun in your life?
Choices, choices everywhere, choose your drop to drink
Check out the colours on the bottle, the sizzle on your steak
Bump into your mates, find any excuse to get away
And carry on shopping with a smile on your face.

A service announcement, shoppers!
You are fat
Nobody likes to say it, but somebody had to say it
And I did say it; you're fat
In fact, your hair colour makes you look positively pregnant
The pimples all over your chin don't help you out either
And those clothes! You poor girl, jeggings are soooo last year!
Now, look at this TV! Yes, gaze deep into the plasma-screen mirror on the wall
See that woman, the pretty one? The skinny one?
That's what you want to look like! If you can look like her
People will think you're hot, and you'll be a better person.
You're going to need a few things though, and luckily for you
We can help!

Buy pimple cream, moisturiser
Fake tan and jewellery
And 20 different types of hair dye too
Buy diet pills and protein shakes
And a treadmill and skipping rope
Some surgery and you'll be a whole new you!
Then buy summer dresses, winter jackets,
Spring shorts and autumn shoes
You'll look just like a princess to behold
Just be careful to make sure you keep on shopping
And you shall never need fear growing old.
Everyone is awesome, everything's amazing
The security guards and clerks, everyone's amazing!
The shoplifters and protesters, they're not so amazing
The sweatshop workers are grateful and amazing
Shopping shopping shopping shopping
This joy I simply cannot contain
Excuse me for a moment, my amazing fellow shoppers
While I duck off and put a bullet in my brain.

Category:

Music

Tags:

• Shopping
• satire
• consumerism
• original
• song
• Funny
• Acoustic
• Songwriter
• Original Song
• Singer
• Acoustic Music