Literally Genesis 33

Happy New Year everybody...

Welcome to part thirty three in this series of videos in which I take the advice of all of those Christian fundamentalists and read my bible - literally

You see if you are going to believe in the literal "truth" of the bible and take it literally then literally is the only way that you can read it.

In this episode Jacob finally makes it back to Canaan and is met at the border by his mortal enemy, his brother Esau

Of course, there's a thin line between love and hate and events don't go quite as expected, it's not like the two of them are going to kiss or anything like that, this is Genesis after all.

Jacob who should of course be known as Israel by now, but for some unknown reason isn't, then introduces Esau to the rest of the family and afterwards Esau invites everyone back to his place at Seir.

Of course, with the family in tow, Jacob has to go at a much slower pace so he agrees to follow on behind and promptly goes somewhere else entirely and then somewhere different after that

In later years scholars speculated that this may be because he didn't realy want to meet up with his brother and he absolutely din't get lost because he refused to ask for directions


Music:
"The Good Book"
Written and Performed by Tim Minchin

http://www.youtube.com/user/timminchin

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• bible
• genesis
• 1-50
• literal
• reading
• parody
• study
• Christian
• fundamentalist
• fundie
• Jacob
• esau
• jabbok
• gifts
• sheep
• goats
• cattle
• cows
• camels
• kiss
• reconcile
• seir

[TheCrankyAtheist]

How many takes did you have to do before you had a usable introduction? I was laughing so hard I had to restart the video twice just to catch the whole thing.

[paulchartley]

@TheCrankyAtheist I actually had to tone it down an awful lot, All that "coming near" in the first few verses could have got me into a lot of trouble.

It did take quite a few takes from loosing it part way through and I got a very funny look from my wife when she heard the bit when Esau ran to meet Jacob.

I had to explain that it is sort of a biblical fuck you to Rick Perry's "strong" video

:0)

[Gripen1974]

Wait whats wrong with a Swedish arm wrestling champion check out Heidi Andersson.

[paulchartley]

@Gripen1974 Well done, I love it when you guys spot the subtle hints.

I was actually thinking of Sarah Backman

Leah couldn't have looked too different from Rachel or Jacob would have been able to tell them apart at the wedding.

I picture Rachel as a giddy mall girl but Leah as quite strong willed, grabbing hold of Jacob and dragging him kicking and screaming in to her tent for a pummelling making him afraid of her.

Think along the lines of the assassin Xenia Onatopp from Goldeneye

:0)

[Huttate1]

This vid is way too long! I shot my load after three minutes and the rest was wasted.

[GoblinXXX]

That pic of Pat Robertson at the end should have faded into a shot of Rick Santorum at the mention of "embarrassing anal seepage". (Great to see another of these!)

[OppositionDept]

Dammit Paul I laughed so hard I hit my head on the floor when i fell out of my seat laughing and got hand lotion on my pants and when i pulled myself out of the tangled mess of my blankets, pants, and lotion, my grandmother came in and did see me in a most awkward position laying on the floor, half naked, and covered in lotion looking like i just fell out of bed while a strange man blathered on computer about two men, having gay sex on a beach

[Astrobrant2]

Thanks, Paul. Enlightening as always.

I guess I called it right, dammit! After getting all those warriors and trekking across the desert for god-knows how long with the purpose of exacting righteous revenge on his lying, cheating brother, Esau just kissed and made up.

His army should have killed him AND Jacob and taken all the women and just started their own country right there.

[bobbytookalook]

Circumcised banana --- lol! Nice touch Paul.

[SuperSoylent2]

Another fine reading.

[talkingprimate]

@DLandonCole I hope you cleaned up!

[talkingprimate]

OMG Tis about time!!!