SINGLES PROFILE (read the description please!)

after months of being frustrated by the online gay singles community, i changed my profile to express exactly how i was feeling... this is a portion of that profile. full profile below:

so as if Pimping oneself online isn't awkward enough, i am now expected to compile some kind of dossier about myself... Ill try to keep this as simple and straight forward as possible.

so here's a Top 5 list of things that u are probably looking for in a man that I most certainly AM NOT...

I AM NOT Butch... for those of u who are leaving this early in the game - thanks for playing!

I AM NOT OutDoorsy... it seems to me that this is an integral part of the bear community. I am not a bear, therefore I do not shit in the woods! I am a faggot - I live with air-conditioning, central heating, plumbing and all other creature comforts - so Im sure that all my bear-like gentlemen are closing this profile out right about....................................NOW!

I AM NOT a "Laid back Kinda Guy"... I see this on so many profiles these days - it's just not humanly possible that every gay man on the internet is laid back... some of u are just as high-strung as i am!... and if u are, then u left about 5 minutes ago.

I AM NOT Your Daddy... for those younger, thinner, prettier men who are looking for someone to take care of them - you're beautiful; and while i might fantasize about u, i fear it is time for "the beautiful ones" to take their leave.

I AM NOT Your Fool... this means i will not be buying nor taking your bullshit. there are plenty of other fat men here who are more than willing to let u lie to them, let u shit on them etc... but i am not "that fat guy" so u can leave now too.

I AM Stubborn
I AM Judgmental
I AM a Snob
I AM a Brat
I AM Sasha Fierce!... just kidding (it's called gay humor, butch man - get over yourself!)

i'm also a good friend... i have the potential of being an even better lover. and I am trustworthy, loyal and when the time comes, monogamous. but just like these last few words, that comes after some time and with a shitload of patience on your part.

so... do u still wanna message me? Do It!

Category:

Film & Animation

Tags:

• xtranormal

[msdrella]

LMAOOO!!!

Love it!

[zeeartfuldodger]

and i LOVE your new profile picture!

[thatsyobabydaddy69]

Will the real Sasha Fierce!,please stand up!, never thaught about internet dating,except once then bow'd out,because I have a strong allergic reaction to Bullshit! *:o)

[zeeartfuldodger]

i don't blame you one bit!... the bullshit runs rampant on all these dating sites!

[perfectdiamondring]

I loved it as always you have done it again

[zeeartfuldodger]

thank you so much!

[msdrella]

that was a b-day pic...

thank you sweetie...

[Umi10]

internet dating is frustrating,Hard work and you meet lots of men who are what I call serial internet whores - they are on every single gay internet dating sites! So 60%of webistes have the same people as eachother!

[zeeartfuldodger]

Thanks! internet dating should not be this frustrating... but it is...lol

[Umi10]

LOL- OMG You know thats who I feel with gay dating on the internet - Thats so Funny and so true! another great video!