Teacher Retirement Song

A song in honor of retiring teachers. Sadly, thunderous applause drowns out the few moments of competent guitar playing. Apologies to music lovers everywhere.


Tears and fears and feeling small
The torture starts up every fall:
The awful things that I've been called
In classrooms every day.

The fire alarm could wake the dead
Water fountains spewing lead
While ceiling tiles fall on my head
I've thought of school that way

I've looked at school from both sides now
I think this year I'll take a bow
From head to toe I'm stiff and sore
I really can't take school anymore

The hungry sixth-grade mind inquires
By seventh, they're accomplished liars
By eighth, they just might slash your tires
I've looked at kids that way

Some will start fights in the halls
Others hide in bathroom stalls
But won't leave your room when nature calls
They're all special in their way

I've looked at kids from both sides now
From short and tall
And I must avow
At least at my age, I can't recall
The majority of them at all

Long vacations, decent pay,
A seven-hour working day,
Inservice naps and fog delays;
Some see this job that way

So now my colleagues think I'm strange.
They can't believe I need a change.
But if you ask me, they're all deranged
For coming back each day.

I've looked at work from both sides now
From rich and poor and still somehow
I've no illusions left at all.
I really won't miss work at all.


Note: If you're looking for brilliant satire, watch some Tom Lehrer videos.

Category:

Music

Tags:

• Paul
• Henehan
• Joni
• Both
• Sides
• Now
• parody

[phuncle]

Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it.

[jasonngo96]

really awesome vid i dislike only the talking part teacher want the class to find a song about teacher so i guess i'm gonna use this one Rating: 5/5

[phuncle]

I know what you mean about the long spoken part, but I left it in for the sake of folks who were there and might want to sit through it again. Thanks very much for the comments. I hope the vid is useful for you.

[phuncle]

I'm flattered, but you know as well as I do that Lehrer is king. I've done about a dozen of these parody/tribute deals and ALL of them use ideas, structures, and most of all inflection that comes straight from Tom. Who else could make the couplet "Oh well/What the hell" sound like Shakespeare? All hail TL!

[phuncle]

Thanks, I'm glad you sat through all the talking to get to the song.  I've added the lyrics to the information box at the top of the page, so now you can see them if you click on "more info".

Now I'll go do the same for my other video

"Mr. Supply Man"

[SUCKMEISTER005]

He had no trouble hitting those high notes. lol

[67emogirl]

I'm retiring this year ans plan to use this as a singalong at my party. Great stuff!!

[HaloNoobNarutofan]

@jasonngo96 did you go to iuk, because i have the same asignment

[familycashflow]

It really is a very heart warming song. I feel the joy along the feeling of missing within the flow of the tune. Thanks for sharing

[agstein56]

It was even better live!

[jeffpickens]

Who's the cretin that gave this great video a thumbs down? Identify yourself, coward!