Calvin Girl - Glenn Bulthuis

Showing once again that Dutch Christian Reformed Church-goers do know how to have a good time with their ladies, Glenn Bultuis and the Tonedeafs sing a beautiful ballad to the lovely ladies of Calvin College in Grand Rapids, Michigan. An explanation of obscure cultural references to follow...

I wanna woman who can love me for life!
I wanna woman who can be a good wife!
I wanna woman who can sing in a choir!
I wanna woman who can change a tire!
I wanna woman - she's gotta be cute -
She's gotta know her Calvin's Institutes!

I wanna woman livin' out in the skids!
I wanna woman wants to have twelve kids!
I wanna woman ain't got no rheumatism!
I wanna woman who knows her catechism!
I wanna woman who can give me what I want-a
I wanna woman who can serve me fried iguana!

I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
Been around the world - I want a Calvin girl!

I wanna woman with her head on straight!
I wanna woman I can take on a date!
I wanna woman who knows right and wrong -
I wanna woman who can mow my lawn!
I wanna woman who can sing in a chorus!
I wanna woman who can serve me brontosaurus!

I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
Been around the world - I want a Calvin girl!

Yeah, yeah,
She's gotta be straight, she's gotta be a sport,
I don't want any women from Dordt.
She's gotta be straight, I don't want no dope -
So don't gimme any women from Hope! Ah no, no, 1, 2, 3,

I wanna woman gimme mental stimulation!
She must approach a thing with serious dedication!
She's gotta know it's more than just infatuation!
She's gotta know some Biblical interpretation!
If this sounds good to you, it's my recommendation
to come on, baby, and fill out an application!

I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
Been around the world - I want a Calvin girl!

I want everybody here
To lend an ear!
'Cause I've been preachin' this word
For twenty-five years!
If you're lookin' for love all around the world,
If you want a good wife, get a Calvin girl!

I got a Calvin girl! I got a Calvin girl!
I got a Calvin girl! I got a Calvin girl!
Been around the world - I want a Calvin girl! Yeah, yeah!
I want a Calvin girl! I want a Calvin girl!
Been around the world - I want a - I want a - I want a Calvin girl!

I want a Calvin girl...I want a Calvin girl,
I want a Calvin girl. I want a Calvin...girl!
--

"Calvin's Institutes" refers to "Institutes of the Christian Religion," a theological masterpiece written by John Calvin in the 16th century.
All genuine Michigan ladies mow their lawns - not the men.
Dordt and Hope are two Reformed Christian colleges that compete with Calvin College, and Calvin and Hope have always been huge rivals.
Note the nod to the Beatles' "I Want to Hold Your Hand" at the end, there.

This song belongs entirely to Glenn Bulthuis and the Tonedeafs.

Category:

Music

Tags:

• Calvin College
• calvin girls
• John Calvin
• Michigan
• western Michigan
• Calvinism
• Dordt college
• Hope college
• Christianity
• Jesus Christ
• romance
• love song
• music

[jbsnumbronefan]

....well the go Hope comment just made things a little awkward...

Lol jk no hate intended ;)

[xoff999]

Go Hope.

[jbsnumbronefan]

Bahaha I love this :) I'm gonna be a Calvin girl soon!!!

[bourne2fly45]

i went to calvin college music camp and he came to sing and he sung this song

[marcellesu]

So gooood! hahah

[hummesz]

I want a Calvin girl tooooo :D ...cool song

[hazelhearts55]

Hahaha

Oh, Calvin. :)

[xjw4ever]

ok that was different