Jesus Was a Mushroom

words and music by Darryl Cherney

Jesus Was a Mushroom

There was a scholar from England
He got a call from the Pope
He said "Come on down to the Vatican
To analyze the Dead Sea Scrolls"
For twenty years he labored
All alone in a little room
And when he came out he promptly pronounced
That Jesus was a mushroom

Chorus:
Jesus was a mushroom, uh huh
Jesus was a mushroom, uh huh
He was a fungus among us
Born in a manger's dung
Jesus was a mushroom, uh, huh

Now as you can imagine
This did not please the pope
Who said "John M. Allegro
You've been smoking too much dope"
But John, he said "Your holiness
You and I are both adults
And the etymology clearly shows
The apostles were a mushroom cult"

Chorus

So how do you think that he walked on the water
How do you think that he raised the dead
It was just folks hallucinating
On the mushrooms they was fed
Why do you think that the Roman's feared him
Why do you think he was crucified
But you can not kill our savior
You just hang him up to dry

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[Sol Star]

was he psilocybin cubensis or amanita musceria? quite a difference.

[LuniaVideo]

Oh, you mean like the Bible and the entire Catholic church spoon feeds everyone lies about their own beliefs?

The etymological evidence proves Jesus was a mushroom or an allegory for a mushroom. And the historical evidence has plenty of evidence for many supposed prophets and saints, with the exception of Jesus. There is absolutely 0 evidence that a person by the name of Jesus ever existed in the time period and location where the Bible claims he did.

[InuzukaCds]

You're a liar. 100% You are not as dumb as you are acting. You have demons. It is scary, but all of you had better wake up.

[SirDarkStar]

Sorry - didn't mean to nerd-snipe you :) I don't claim it's conclusive

some references

The Sacred Mushroom and the Cross; John Marco Allegro

The Holy Mushroom: Evidence of Mushrooms in Judeo-Christianity; Jan Irvin

Mushrooms, Myth and Mithras (and many papers and other books); Carl A. P. Ruck, Ph.D. Classical studies

v=mOu9tV6uy2E is a rare video interview with Allegro

[mrcannibalfreak]

damnit, you just gave me something i have to research all night before going to bed.

[SirDarkStar]

Actually, John Marco Allegro was very serious and he was a serious scholar. He was one of the very few selected to view and translate the Dead Sea scrolls at that time. You can disagree with his conclusions but the claim itself is quite serious.

Do you have any idea just how many 'mystery' (hallucinogen using, Eleusinian Mysteries, etc) cults there were in those days?

The claim isn't even remotely unlikely on those grounds.

[mrcannibalfreak]

if you think atheists really believe this you may have some extra chromosomes. it's just a joke you christfag piece of shit

[Jo l]

why not both in sufficient threshold doses?