1. Prevent Identity Theft By Changing Identity Every Three Years

  2. The Onion Voter's Guide To Barack Obama

  3. Porkin' Across America With Today Now!'s Jim Haggerty - Preview

  4. Mice: Nature's Disposable Animals - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 11

  5. Dredged Stereo? - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  6. How To Feel Emotions When Holding Your Newborn - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  7. White House Officials Confirm Malia Obama Now Seven Feet, Nine Inches Tall

  8. What Is Your Amateur Porn Telling Employers About You?

  9. Apple Unveils Much-Anticipated iPhone 4SE

  10. Joe Biden Hitchhikes To Democratic National Convention

  11. Manatees: I Saw Manatees Gang Rape A Crippled Manatee Once, Really - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 10

  12. Snake Eggs - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  13. Hack Pesky Time Loops With Insults - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  14. How Do I Get Those Weight Loss Throat Worms - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  15. The A.V. Club's PARAMETER Film Contest: The Ballad of Oscar Homeslice

  16. The Desert: Where Life Goes To Die - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 9

  17. Misappraisal - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  18. Banjo Hacking - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  19. Mitt Romney Graciously Accepts Thing He Has Paid Millions Of Dollars For

  20. Sex House - Reunion - Ep. 10

  21. Sex House - Ep. 10 - Extended Preview

  22. Suspicious Hat - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  23. How To Die Right After Seeing DC Cherry Blossoms - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  24. Lance Armstrong's Publicity Team Playing Up The 1993 Norway Road Race Title He Still Has

  25. Everyone Unaware How Much Freshman Doing Keg Stand Secretly Misses His Parents

  26. Tampa Bay Gay Prostitutes Gearing Up For Flood Of Closeted Republicans

  27. Sex Climax - Sex House - Ep. 9

  28. Deer: Deer Are Fine - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 8

  29. Hound On The Dock - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  30. Spit Bread On Your Table Properly - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  31. Obama Starring In New Judd Apatow Comedy To Appeal To Younger Voters

  32. Roger Goodell Reveals That All Preseason Games Have Secretly Been Regular Season Games

  33. Putin Learns Putin Behind Plot To Assassinate Putin

  34. This Week In History: The Beatles Play Shea Stadium In Huge Gig Opening For The Mamas And The Papas

  35. Obama Up Early Cooking Breakfast In One Of Michelle's Extra Long T-Shirts

  36. Orgy Scheming - Sex House - Ep. 8

  37. Animals Spread Disease Constantly - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 7

  38. Coins/Pen - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  39. Blankets No Longer Warm Me - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  40. Weird, Area Woman Wasn't Harassed Today

  41. Behind The Pen: Reading, Writing and Robbery

  42. Man Doesn't Even Do Good Job At Sleeping

  43. Jailed Nelson Mandela Becomes Fully Rehabilitated Through South Africa's Stellar Penal System

  44. Chicago Cubs Combine Seven Players To Form One Giant Player Called "Chicagazor"

  45. Sex In A Bottle - Sex House - Ep. 7

  46. Cheap, Clean Natural Gas: Earth's One Good Feature - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 6

  47. Shitbucket Of John Wilkes Booth - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  48. My Baby Got Carried Away By A Tumbleweed - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  49. Usain Bolt Sprints To Gold In Front Of Virulent Racist Queen Elizabeth II

  50. GOP Trying To Keep Elderly Voting Base Alive Until November

  51. Dr. Sex - Sex House - Ep. 6

  52. Spiders: Christ, Fucking Spiders - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 5

  53. Pilfering Pete's Briefcase - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  54. Simple Ways To Hack Your Breadstick - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  55. Opt Out Of Olive Garden's Bread Bowl, It's Your Right - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  56. Coach K Hires Coxswain To Keep USA Basketball Team Motivated And In Rhythm

  57. Fucking Oasis To Probably Be Worked Into Olympics Opening Ceremony

  58. God Tells IOC President To Build Ark, Gather 2 Olympians From Each Sport

  59. Horrible Couple Really Wants Wedding To Reflect Their Personalities

  60. Banana Sex Olympics - Sex House - Ep. 5

  61. Robins: The Perfect Murder Machine - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 4

  62. Revolting Silt - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  63. Find The Sweet Apricots You Buried So Long Ago - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  64. Reporters Struggling To Maintain Energy Until Election

  65. Blood-Drenched, Berserk CEO Demands More Web Videos

  66. Martin Luther King Bust First Thing To Go, Romney Advisor Quietly Thinking

  67. Penn State Offers Victims The Chance To Vandalize Joe Paterno's Statue

  68. PARAMETER: The A.V. Club's Short Film Competition

  69. Erin Bares It All - Sex House - Ep. 4

  70. Tidal Pools: Nature's Putrid Sewers - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 3

  71. 100 iPhones Found In Lake - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  72. Kenneth Branagh's Mechanical Spider Attacking You? Stop Him - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  73. This Week In History: Holy Shit, Man Walks On Fucking Moon

  74. HP Offers 'That Cloud Thing Everyone Is Talking About'

  75. Captain Actual America Overweight, Hopelessly In Debt

  76. Cubs Finally Remove Wrigley Field Ivy After Third Outfielder Hangs Himself On A Vine

  77. Get On That Pole! - Sex House - Ep. 3

  78. Chimpanzees: Dumber Than All Humans - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 2

  79. Mountain Dew Can Provides Pleasant Challenge For Appraiser - Lake Dredge Appraisal

  80. My iPhone Is Covered In White Mold! Help! - Troublehacking with Drew Cleary

  81. Ron Paul Makes Campaign Stop In Whimsical Jalopy

  82. New Ad Urges Hipsters To Go To Applebee's Ironically

  83. Sexy Truth or Sexy Dare - Sex House - Ep. 2

  84. Zebras: Nature's Ultimate Prey - Horrifying Planet - Ep. 1

  85. Lake Dredge Appraisal - Chicken Wire/Muddy Pot

  86. Troublehacker - Whenever I Leave The House, Broken Glass Cuts My Feet

  87. New Prius Helps Environment By Killing Its Owner

  88. Sex House - Meet The Nymphos - Ep. 1

  89. Romney's Numbers Skyrocket After Prostitute Reveals She Paid Him To Sleep With Her

  90. Roger Federer Nearly Blows Chance At Wimbledon By Introducing Crabgrass To The Courts

  91. Internet Scam Alert: Most "Kickstarter" Projects Just Useless Crap

  92. Are Wetland Preserves Simply Dead-Body Dumping Grounds?

  93. Nike Releases New Olympic Track Suits Designed To Limit Penis Wind Resistance

  94. Tea Party Quiet... Too Quiet

  95. Breaking Story So New Reporter Literally Has No Information

  96. This Week In History: Statue Of Liberty Arrives From France, Moves Into Cramped Tenement Building

  97. Romney Wears Anti-Bacterial Yellow Gloves While Greeting Rust Belt Americans

  98. Miami Marlins Deploy Airborne Drones to Seek Young Fans, Shoot T-Shirts At Them

  99. Reporter Goes Undercover In Chinatown By Wearing Silk Robe