Nick Helm Poem

I DO NOT MAKE MONEY FROM MY VIDEOS. And I have NO affiliation with any party or promotion. It's just a brilliant poem.
As a sign of respect, I'll include the info site for tour dates below and the transcript which I k now is a little wrong, but i'll fix it.
http://www.ents24.com/web/artist/100819/Nick_Helm.html

A Poem By the Brilliant comedian Nick Helm.

It's been really nice to meet you, and getting to know you these last few days,
And if you'd like to keep in contact then I think that would be just great!

Maybe you could write to me and we could be just like pen pals,
but I suppose people don't write letters anymore because it's normally just all emails......

Which is shame.

I understand that you live there, and I live all the way over here,
But you're more than welcome to drop by anytime, if you're ever near.

And if you need a place to crash, then you can have my sofa bed,
but my real bed's pretty big really, so you could share with me instead.

If you wanted to stay for more than one night, like 2 ....or 3 or 4,
you wouldn't even need to ask me, because you could even stay for....5.

And I could show you around all the places that I hung out as a kid,
And if that sort of thing interests you, I could you show you what I did.
But if it doesn't, then maybe we could just go out for a walk,
or we could stay in, and sit in silence, and not even have to talk.

If after a while you wanted to move your things in bit by bit,
then I'd empty half a shelf for you where your toothbrush could sit.
If after a while you wanted to move yourself in - all at once!...
...then I'd think that would be alright too, and I would jump at the chance!

And after thinking about it, you wanted to go halfsies on a pet,
then it'd have to be a dog, because I'm allergic to cats.
And I know that's a big decision to make, so it would absolutely be up to you,
but anything you're thinking, I might be thinking to.

And newspapers on Sundays and dinner with our friends,
but if you didn't have any, then there's some of mine I would lend.

If after a few weeks we'd think about getting married,
and pick out spots for honeymoons, and where the threshold should be carried.
And a few weeks after that, we could think about family options,
and if one of us was barren we could look into adoption....
Because there are a lot of children out there who don't have a mum or dad,
And I reckon we'd make good ones, or at least ones not-so-bad.

And we can get jobs and promotions, and do the things we really like,
and buy our kid the things you buy, like dolls and skates and bikes.
And I'll teach him or her to ride it, like my daddy did for me,
and you can put the plasters on, when they fall and graze their knee.

And on parents-evening we could get a baby sitter...
it'd be like going out on dates all over again, nice to be alone.
And we'll send them off to University,
and comfort each other when they're gone.....
....and I'll hold you in my arms, and tell you term-time's not that long.

We'll attend the graduation ceremony and embarrass them with photos,
because by that time I don't suppose there'd be many things we'd go to.

And then they'd get a job, and we'd help them out with rent and general bills,
and we'd accept the fact they'd grown up, and only need us when they're ill.

We'd grow to retirement age and plan to move to Spain,
and we'd never ever wonder if we could 'do it all again'.

And I hope you know your sacrifice was never left unnoticed,
and the kid we had and raised together was worth not getting promoted.

And maybe you'd get irritated by my constant snoring,
but then again maybe, I would find your stories boring.

But you and me side by side, walking hand in hand,
would know that even little arguments, are all part of the plan.

And when we're old and fat and gray with twinkling in our eyes,
I'd love you and forgive you for looking at those other guys.

And when you're tired or sick or grumpy, and the days are wet,
I'll make sure even those days, are the days we don't forget.

And I bet spending my life with you, will make us want to live forever,
and maybe we'll be lucky and our lives will end together.

Because knowing you, these last-few-days has turned my life around,
...And I thank my maker, Everyday
for this person that I've found.

Category:

Entertainment

Tags:

• Nick
• Helm
• Poem

[Theitisme400]

needs a couple of listens