Scalpel-Free Vasectomy

What do you do when your wife refuses to sleep with you again until you get snipped, but you're afraid of the knife? Why, a scalpel free vasectomy of course!

Check out another one like this: "Sit On My Big Deck!" -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ple9PH...

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Script:

HUSBAND - Josh Rimer
WIFE/RECEPTIONIST/DOCTOR - Andy Rimer
PATIENT - Thomas Demkey
Director - Sarah Empey
Camera Operator - Damon Winters
Production Assistants - Kevin Currie/Jeffery Blumer/Paul Marshall
Makeup Artist - Tansy Lam
Writers - Travis Quinton & Josh Rimer
---
Script:

WIFE: Don't touch me.
HUSBAND: Why? What's wrong?
WIFE: We are not having sex ever again,
until you get fixed! I'm so tired... three sets of twins is just more than I can handle, and
I'm not about to take a chance on having another accidental set.
HUSBAND: Fine, then get your tubes tied.
WIFE: I think I've already put myself through more than enough. You get yours snipped.
HUSBAND: But, I'm allergic to scalpels.
WIFE: Fine, forget it then - never again!
The WIFE: gets up and leaves to go to bed. HUSBAND: sits and
thinks looking unsure and uncomfortable.

HUSBAND: Hi, uhh.... I'd like... ummm.. To have the... the... scalpel free thingy.
RECEPTIONIST: Do you have an appointment?
HUSBAND: No. I... well, I just need to get it done right away.
RECEPTIONIST: Well, you're actually in luck. We just had a cancellation. What is
your name?
HUSBAND: Ummm... my name? Ya, uhh... Jackson. Jackson Smuckerton.
RECEPTIONIST: Right. Have a seat.

RECEPTIONIST:
Mr. Smuckerton.
RECEPTIONIST:
Mr. Smuckerton.
RECEPTIONIST:
MR. JACKSON SMUCKERTON!
HUSBAND: Oh, uh, ya, that's me.
RECEPTIONIST: The Doctor will see you now.
HUSBAND: He will?
RECEPTIONIST: Yes.
HUSBAND: Oh, well... ummm...
RECEPTIONIST: NOW Mr. Smuckerton.

DOCTOR: Good afternoon. So, what brings you in today.
HUSBAND: Well, uhh... I saw the sign and... I'd like to get the uhh...
DOCTOR: Scalpel free vasectomy? No problem. You're certain that's
what you'd like to do?
HUSBAND: Yes... my WIFE: won't sleep with me until I get it done.
DOCTOR: Ah yes, that happens a lot. Ok, well what I need you to do is to
stand facing the wall with your feet about shoulder width apart. Now, there may be some swelling. And you probably will have to continue to abstain from
intercourse for a couple of days.
HUSBAND:
Oh, ok. Is the procedure complicated?
DOCTOR: Not at all. It will only take a few moments.
HUSBAND: Great.
DOCTOR: Now, if I could get you to pull down your pants, and we'll begin. Here, you may want to bite down on this. The initial sensation may be a bit of a shock.
HUSBAND: Really? I...
DOCTOR: Ok, let's begin! (KICK) Finished! And I'm happy to report
that the procedure went smoothly and is a complete success.
Please see the Receptionist on your way out and ask for our VIP card.
HUSBAND: VIP card?
DOCTOR: Yes - Very Important Penis card. If you find that the procedure hasn't completely worked, you may need to come back and have it done
again a few more times. With the VIP card your tenth visit is free!

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• sketch
• comedy
• skit
• snl
• madtv
• mad
• tv
• scalple
• scalpelfree
• vasectamy
• funny
• brothers

[cunnamullafalla]

At first I thought "whats this shit about? I'm trying to find serious stuff on Vasectomy's" but I loved it! I LOVED IT!!! well done lads.

[JoshRimer]

@cunnamullafalla Ha, awesome - glad you liked it! Sorry it wasn't very educational. ;-)

[MrMadmardin]

You have to have a mental disorder to get a Vasectomy. 

[JoshRimer]

@MrMadmardin lol, no you don't - it's just a form of birth control

[GothicNightDreams]

Hahahaha xD well one can make lots of money off that job in the scalpel free vasectomy clinic :P (And you just get to kick balls all day)

[JoshRimer]

@GothicNightDreams I know right, what an awesome job! ;-)

[SamWiseGamChee]

i watched this cuz Daculah favored it... not bad :)

[greenpalaka]

younger brother looks like cody simpson...

LUV SHORT GUYS..CUTE AS HELL

[1Ecstacy]

JOSH UR KILLING ME!! BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH!! I CANT STOP WATCHING THIS ONE. ITS SO FUNNY. UR A GREAT ACTOR

[1Ecstacy]

I'M GLAD I FOUND THIS!

[TheBigboy46]

i had my vasectomy when i was 20 years old since i'm mentally challenged. i had my parents get me a vasectomy because of my disability.

[milad83300]

ugly animals

[nutzyboy801]

1:51 lol'd my ass off xD

[faisel2]

i loled the shit out of me at the desk "lady" hahahah, great!

[SpandyAndyDotCom]

@greenpalaka Thanks! (6 months later)