Video Of Me NAKED!

Monologue:

"GOTCHA!!!! I got you to click the video! Didn't I...just because of the stupid title? That's right! In the video business, this is what we call a 'gotcha video!' Now, seriously speaking folks, do you honestly think I was going to come out here on the World Wide Web and make a complete ass out of myself by going BARE...if you will, on the internet? Give me a break! That's not what I do overhere. The only thing that you people are going to get even remotely close to anything naked on this channel is the naked truth, when I talk about all kinds of issues overhere! But you're never going to see the 'ol Portuguese Paisain naked! No you're not. (Ha ha ha!)

My producer's telling me something sick! You gotta be kidding me! My producer is telling me that there are people watching this video right now that want me to strip overhere! You gotta be...You guys are sick freaks! You're freaking me out, dammit! My producer is reminding me that I insist that I do everything for my viewers...And that's been a protocol of mine over the years as long as I have been on this channel to do what the viewers want me to do! You want me to strip...? Are you kidding me?! Are you for real? Are you frickin' kidding me?! My producer keeps telling me...Hey producer, keeps your pants on! (PUN INTENDED!) Alright, here goes absolutely nothing! Dang, even the camera's shaking at the mere thought of me stripping overhere!...You can't be serious? In the words of John Mcenroe, "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS?!" Alright...what the hell?!

Oh, this can't be good at all! Alrighty then, remember this is on you! You people asked for this, not me...not my producer! Here goes absolutely nothing! You gotta be kidding me! Alrighty then...! Weeee! Damn, I can't believe I'm doing this shit! Now, this is as far as I'll go! I will not go any further than this! Are you satisfied? I hope you're satisfied! I made a complete ass out of myself on the World Wide Web! Well, at least my ass is still covered and it's going to stay that way, capice...good, good?

What do you morons want to see next for my next video, me shaving? I sure could use one right now! It looks like I'm going to have to shave my fucking back too! Can you believe this? Damn, I look like a frickin' monkey! I better get the hell outta here! I'm making I'm making too BIG an ass out of myself but some people say I do that all the time overhere! But I digress! Get me outta here! Please stop the pain! Hey Alfredo, get the hook; Get me outta here! Stop recording! I pressed STOP RECORDING!!!! Stop the pain!"

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Category:

Comedy

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