The Thanksgiving Song

It's important to remember to not just be thankful for just the great stuff in life cuz it's the truly fucked up shit which reminds you that yer still alive.

(VERSE 1)
E Give thanks For all the dead (A) natives in the world
E Give thanks For atom bombs an (A) little still born girls
E Give thanks for every thing we've (A) ever done wrong
E Give thanks For all that fuzzy shit (A) that's growin in yer bong

(BREAK)
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(VERSE 2)
E Give thanks To Jesus for the (A) bombed abortion clinics
E Give thanks To weasels and the (A) far right cynics
E Give thanks To pine beetles hep (A) c an HIV
E Give thanks To all the assholes on the (A) net like me

(BREAK)
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(CHORUS)
C give thanks
Am to things that suck
D But let you know that your (G) alive
C Cuz when yer dead
Am It's all so perfect
D An nothin ever makes you (G) cry

C Give thanks
Am To all the shit
D That drives you crazy when you (G) drive
C Cuz once yer gone
Am It ain't so fun
D To bitch an whine until you (G) die (B7)

(VERSE 3)
E Give thanks For Jonas brothers an all the (A) girls they never anged
E Give thanks For jerkin with a noose (A) until yer hanged
E Give thanks For little kids who play with (A) big plastic bags
E Give thanks For every redneck screamin (A) "Lynch them fuckin' Fags!"

(BREAK)
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(VERSE 4)
E Give thanks To every Jew who ever (A) made it in the ovens
E Give thanks To Scooby Doo an every crusty ole curmudgeon
E Give thanks To what we do whenever our (A) minds refuse to broaden
E Give thanks To who we screw an all the (A) bodies in the garden

(BREAK)
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(CHORUS)
C Give thanks
Am To things that suck
D But let you know that your (G) alive
C Cuz when yer dead
Am It's all so perfect
D An nothin ever makes you (G) cry

C Give thanks
Am To all the shit
D That drives you crazy when you (G) drive
C Cuz once yer gone
Am It ain't so fun
D To bitch an whine until you (G) die (B7)

(VERSE 5)
E Give thanks For atrocities like (A) murder rape an famine
E Give thanks For animosities and (A) mercury in salmon
E Give thanks For all the shitty things (A) your parents ever did
E Give thanks For every one of those you (A) then did to your kids

(VERSE 6)
E Give thanks For necrophiliacs and (A) puss and severed limbs
E Give thanks For righteous bombs upon a (A) buss that's filled with kids
E Give thanks For every evil deed that a (A) human can commit
E Give thanks To killer tidal waves (A) cuz earth don't give a shit

(BREAK
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(CHORUS)
C Give thanks
Am To things that suck
D But let you know that your (G) alive
C Cuz when yer dead
Am It's all so perfect
D An nothin ever makes you (G) cry

C Give thanks
Am To all the shit
D That drives you crazy when you (G) drive
C Cuz once yer gone
Am It ain't so fun
D To bitch an whine until you (G) die (B7)

(REPEAT VERSE 1)
E Give thanks For all the dead (A) natives in the world
E Give thanks For atom bombs an (A) little still born girls
E Give thanks for every thing we've (A) ever done wrong
E Give thanks For all that fuzzy shit (A) that's growin in yer bong

(BREAK)
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(REPEAT VERSE2)
E Give thanks To Jesus for the (A) bombed abortion clinics
E Give thanks To weasels and the (A) far right cynics
E Give thanks To pine beetles hep (A) c an HIV
E Give thanks To all the assholes on the (A) net like me

(BREAK)
C Amin G Give thanks X2

(CHORUS)
C give thanks
Am to things that suck
D But let you know that your (G) alive
C Cuz when yer dead
Am It's all so perfect
D An nothin ever makes you (G) cry

C Give thanks
Am To all the shit
D That drives you crazy when you (G) drive
C Cuz once yer gone
Am It ain't so fun
D To bitch an whine until you (G) die (B7)

(CHORUS)
C Give thanks
Am To things that suck
D But let you know that your (G) alive
C Cuz when yer dead
Am It's all so perfect
D An nothin ever makes you (G) cry

C Give thanks
Am To all the shit
D That drives you crazy when you (G) drive
C Cuz once yer gone
Am It ain't so fun
D To bitch an whine until you (G) die (B7)

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• ScaryDAve
• thechurchofdave
• thanks
• giving
• thanksgiving
• song
• funny
• seriously
• fucked
• up

[MONSTER2831]

dude THIS IS FUCKING AWSOME!!! MAKE MORE, LOL

[thechurchofdave]

@MONSTER2831 Yeah I kinda like this one myself. The Christmas song is pretty fucked up too hehe

[MONSTER2831]

@MONSTER2831 YOUR SO AWSOME! DUDE I WISH I WAS YOUR FRIEND! WE WOULD HAVE HELLA FUN WE WOULD MAKE FUCKED UP SONGS!!

[thechurchofdave]

@MONSTER2831 >:)

[rs4us]

The lyrics are pretty fucked up xD

But they are true anyway..

Awsome song anyway...

How long did it take to write it?

[thechurchofdave]

rs4us: This is what I would call a formula song. Once you figure out the over all structure and the ideas and twists/humor involved it tends to feel like it's writing itself. I don't remember for sure but I am guessing this only took an hour or two max.

[Goregoon]

I give thanks to ScaryDAve for telling it like it is! (well, singing it like it is anyway)

[MoEnzyme]

Don't forget to say thanks for the great floating Pacific garbage dump, too. I don't know anything about this god thingy, but if there's any ounce of truth there its this: 1) he really must love stupid people, because he made so many - so thanks god; 2) yes its a he. I mean we all know that women must engage in their requisite quota of stupidity each day, but it really takes a man to fuck things up as spectacularly as he does. - once again thanks god.

[The420angelina]

fuckn rightness lol its sweet its true lol

[warpedwiselegoman]

Dave,you're criminally undersubbed!

Happy Thanksgiving!

[MrTwister4Life]

as far as Im concerned, this should be our new national anthem.

[rs4us]

Ah, I got it..

Awsome