Get The Hook, You Suck!

What happens when someone is putting on such a bad performance? You get the hook and get him/her off the damn stage! I think the hook definitely needs to make an appearance here!

Sillylogue (A silly monologue!):

"Well hello there, I see that you decided to come back to this channel! That's good...because I have a very special segment for you today! I'm going to recite you a poem I just wrote for my book "Sousa's Book Of 'Classic' Poetry." That's right. This poem will soon be a 'classic!' That goes without saying. Let's open up the book overhere. Put it right in front of me. Let me get my thinking cap on. Get it, thinking cap? Of course you get it! Alright, sinch it in there! I look like John Cena...anyway. This poem is called "Deli Poetry." Oh, it's good. Trust me; it's very good!

"Roses are red; Violets are blue.
If you hate me, I hate you too!
A lady asked me for a pound of spiced ham.
So I gave her a can of Hormel Spam!

An elderly man bought a rotisserie chicken.
24 hours later, I fopund out he was severly sickened!
"What seems to be the problem?" I asked the man.
He said, I suffered from a severe case of Salmonella!"
Well sir, let's see what we can do then.
May I offer you a free sample of our new Mortadella?!"

(Here comes the hook!) What the hell is this?! This is a hook! This is what they use for people that suck on the show! Some asshole is trying to get me off my own show! This is my own show! You're not going to kick me off my own show! Get the hook. But get it for somebody else! This is for people who suck! I don't suck! Listen! I have one more verse overhere! I'm going to finish the damn poem whether anybody likes it or not! So calm down! Alright...last verse: (Oh, you son of a...!)

"It's closing time and I want to go home!
So won't you please just leave me alone!
In the end, everything will be just fine!
Because no matter what, I'm always out by nine!"

(Fighting with the hook!) It's come down to this, folks. I'm wrestling with a frickin' hook! I'm not done yet! (Yes you are, jackass!) GET THE HOOK!...DAMN!"

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Category:

Comedy

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