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This video is unlisted. Only those with the link can see it. The Partisans - A Carol For The Rest Of Us

TheSecondCityNetwork TheSecondCityNetwork·311 videos
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Published on Dec 22, 2011

Offered with real love and affection for our religious brethren--and dedicated to the memory of the late, great, Christopher Hitchens.

Ol' Hitch, of course, would have just hated this video. He was a brilliant man not given to seasonal cheer:

"I absolutely abominate absolutely everything about this season of the year...it's not just that attendance and observance are compulsory and conscripted (though that would be bloody bad enough). It's that ENTHUSIASM is COMPULSORY TOO. You can't just conform and get by. You are always being urged to join in. Of what does this remind me? Of Dear Leader's Birthday in some godawful one-party banana republic or people's democracy, that's what." (The Nation, 1/13/97)

Sounds like fun! Uncompromising genius doesn't take holidays.

But though the world of infidels has lost an intellectual giant, it has a chance to grow and evolve. The shrill atheism voiced by the likes of Hitchens and Dawkins is fine for another generation, but there are plenty of atheists nowadays confident enough in their non-belief that they don't feel like they have to be fucking dicks about it.

So feel free to bow your head in insincere reverence as often as necessary--or hell, possible--this holiday season. Part of being a humanist is loving the weird, weird shit that humans do. Fellow atheist, you probably do all sorts of weird ritualistic shit that seems strange to outsiders and doesn't do anything but make you feel better about stuff--you just call it "line dancing," or "must-see TV," or "moderate opiate use."

As for Hitchens, all this glad-handing would have just pissed him off.

And that's cool, he has no idea this is happening. Because when you die, you're just dead.

Merry Christmas, everybody!

For more satire this political season, like us on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/ThePartisansC...
http://www.facebook.com/TheSecondCity...

Written by Andy Cobb & Joshua Funk
Directed by Andy Cobb & Joshua Funk
http://www.twitter.com/andycobb
Produced by Mark Kienlen
Edited by Mark Kienlen & Mike Damanskis
Music by Joshua Funk
Couple: Brian Hunt and Robyn Norris

Follow us on Twitter! http://twitter.com/secondcitynetwk

©2010 The Second City Inc./Andy Cobb

The Second City Network is quickly becoming one of the hottest channels on YouTube. Our work has been featured on Tosh.0 on Comedy Central, G4's Attack of the Show, Inside Edition, NPR, MSNBC, CNN and more!

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Top Comments

  • donotoperateoncrack

    that was disturbingly beautiful

    · 33

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  • Ryan Frederick

    < Currently transforming back into a heathen.

    · 28

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All Comments (374)

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  • therealbertho

    No, you pretty much nailed it.

    ·

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    in reply to Slacktoo (Show the comment)
  • Slacktoo

    Right, because the atheists are always doing everything perfectly and the Christians are the immature assholes? Not.

    ·

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  • NicholasKreuz

    LMAO this is the best! EVER

    ·

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    in playlist Music
  • PermianExtinction

    Um... why are people talking about things related to er, JUDAISM here? OF ALL IRRELEVANT THINGS?

    Oh, and heathens FTW!

    ·

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  • controlfreak1983

    Love this video. So true, about how people truly behave

    ·

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  • OpalSerpent

    So deaf and blind, explain why nsa only released these documents

    last year. If you haven't heard about this story then you are eyes wide shut.

    I suggest you wake up to the lies we are told.

    nsa foia et communications 1957

    type the above into google and take a look at what your government is trying

    to suppress. You certainly don't hear about this on the news now do you?

    but I don't know anything do I?

    Also I suggest people check out the 911 missinglinks website and watch the doc.

    ·

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    in reply to mad dusa (Show the comment)
  • OpalSerpent

    And why is that? after doing enough research you see there is a

    world wide zionist conspiracy. Let people decide for themselves.

    Googling false flag terrorism will give people an idea why governments do things to

    their own people. I suppose you think the mk ultra program was a conspiracy.

    Putting people in coffins and letting them die to see the end results and other

    staggeringly horrific things. They were only discovered from accounting records

    because the truth was concealed.

    ·

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    in reply to mad dusa (Show the comment)
  • mad dusa

    glad you like the palestinians, but you're still a phenomenal ignoramus in regards to history & religion & sweeping racist conspiracy theories.

    ·

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    in reply to OpalSerpent (Show the comment)
  • OpalSerpent

    on the contrary I like everyone else wants the truth. Calling me names is not the truth. I think palestinians rock so I can't be a white supremacist like you make out.

    ·

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    in reply to mad dusa (Show the comment)
  • mad dusa

    wow. you're so deep into your white supremacist indoctrination that you don't know the first thing about history, reality or religion. but i'm not going to waste my time educating you. you wouldn't be able to think outside of your racist brainwashing anyway. let's just hope you never escape from your montana holdout.

    ·

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    in reply to OpalSerpent (Show the comment)
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