Published on May 24, 2013
In a speech today, president Obama promised to continue using drone strikes against terrorist targets, despite the fact that the strikes have been known to kill innocent civilians. Or as Omar of Pakistans famous "Child Sized Coffin Bazaar" described it - "I'm getting a Lexus!".
Internet radio company Pandora still haven't named a CEO, 2 months after the previous CEO stepped down. The search is being hindered by the company's policy of letting a computer choose the applicants based on how well they resemble previous CEO's, rather than just choosing the CEO they want directly.
Polish surgeons have successfully completed the worlds first emergency face transplant, grafting an entirely new face onto a man just weeks after his face was destroyed in an accident. "A new face, of course!" said Toronto mayor Rob Ford.
And finally, someone called "Amanda Bynes" was arrested yesterday for throwing a bong out the window. I know she's famous, but I'm not sure what for, and it doesn't seem worth Wikipedia'ing. In our last 10 seconds, here are 10 things "Amanda Bynes" may be famous for:
Shot put champion?
Depressing sex tape?