Letters to an Asexual #1

This is the beginning of a series in which I will read correspondence between me and people who have questions, comments, or--more often--misconceptions about asexuality. I don't have a set number of these I'm going to do, and I imagine I'll continue to get material for them as life goes on, but I currently have quite a backlog, so you can expect material to last for some time at least. :)

This particular video deals with a man who just didn't get it who messaged me through OKCupid. This is a very abridged selection of our conversation; not all of it was about asexuality, but a good chunk of it revolved around his inability to process it.

The site I mentioned in the video: OKCupid. If you want to see my profile, check it out:
http://www.okcupid.com/profile?u=swankivy

Category:

People & Blogs

Tags:

• asexual
• asexuality
• celibacy
• alternative
• sexuality
• dating
• nonsexuality

[moonharpz321]

am i asexual? i always reject sex requests, nor i feel love when im kissing boys. ive also kissed girls,just as gross. idk, im only 13 and its common to be "confused" at this age . boys make me sick.so im not that straight. but girls i feel nothing.so im not gay. even if i was boy crazy, id have a hard time attracting guys. eh i hope asexualality gets known more...

[swankivy]

@moonharpz321 Well, other people can't tell you whether you're asexual or not, and you are pretty young, but what's important right now is that you understand you're not broken if you don't develop interest in sex or find people sexually appealing. You might change in the future, but as long as you know you don't "have to," you'll be okay. I hope asexuality gets known more too.

[PokeEXE]

I love you in a completely platonic way. You're such a brave and intelligent woman! I love your videos c:

[swankivy]

@PokeEXE Thank you, I appreciate the compliment and your continued watching. :)

[mcrorfob]

Some people don't believe we exist? Haha, my fellow asexys, we are unicorns! :D

Btw, impressive video! I could tell by your narrative voice that you were an author. I am also a (young) author. Keep on your art!

[ShihTzusShit]

some people just don't believe asexuality exists. Maybe it's our oversexed culture nowadays...

I mean, my own mother still thinks I'm a closet lesbian. She doesn't believe me.

[swankivy]

@Thechosendude509 . . . Of course asexuals can adopt. Most people can adopt, though I hear two-parent homes are more likely to get approved.

[Thechosendude509]

@swankivy

Asexuals can still adopt right?

[swankivy]

@DracoAquarian1 Eh, I don't really consider it a waste if I can later use the conversation to be instructive or inspiring for others. If I can't get through to the person I'm talking to, they can become a bad example. :) Yes, I'm aware how chock full of oversexed ignoramuses the world is . . . I run into them regularly as they question me on how I can possibly expect to be happy if I don't pursue happiness in the same ways they do. Clearly ever so enlightened, no?

[DracoAquarian1]

It's unfortunate...... that you wasted all that precious time arguing with an over-sexed belligerent ignoramus. Believe me the world is chocked full of these types. I believe it is why the world is in the state it is today.

Anyway I love your video; keep on keepin' on !

Tootles :)

[swankivy]

@eggiex1 Eh, I disagree here. I do think people who are in charge of the government shouldn't be making bad decisions in general, no matter what temptations or proclivities inspire them to do so, but I feel like actually saying only asexual people can be elected suggests that sexual people just plain can't be expected to control themselves (even if electing only asexuals were possible). It'd be setting an example that it's expected/accepted to behave inappropriately if you're sexual.

[eggiex1]

Also, 49 people think asexuals are people who like ass sex.